Marriage Law: After the War
by SunshineForrest
Summary: Hermione faces loss even after the Dark Lord was defeated. With a Marriage Law imposed on top of everything else, it is hard to cope in a backwards world where everything is taken from you.
1. In Which A Heart Is Broken

Chapter 1: In Which a Heart Is Broken

A/N: Hello! I first want to give a warning

WARNING: This is Hurt/Comfort, but it's not going to be pretty. There will be mentions of suicide and Character Death

Now that that's done and over with, I appreciate you guys reading. Please don't take me too seriously. This Fic is canon except for epilogue and of course, Snape lives, the tenacious bastard.

Disclaimer: I don't own, nor do I make any money from Harry Potter.

Hermione looked down at the letter in her hands, not seeing what was really there. She had just got them back. She had just got them to trust her again. Now they were gone forever. She looked down at her letter again.

Ms. Hermione Granger:

We regret to inform you that on July 27, 2000, John H. Granger and Helen J. Granger perished in a car crash. ….

She couldn't read any more of the automatically generated letter. She couldn't bear to hear any more of the fake condolences forced upon her. She had seen them just the other day. Their smiling faces waving goodbye to her were in her mind's eye as she tore through her parent's house.

Rage was coursing through her, but there was something else behind her emotions. She pounded up the stairs to her parent's bedroom. Hermione sobbed when she saw a solitary photograph of her and her parents on a ski trip. It was a muggle photograph, but the amount of love that was held in her parent's eyes seemed to tear her heart in two. She grabbed the picture frame and threw it against the wall. The glass shattered, some of it flying back onto her, and the frame broke in two.

Grief broke through her rage. It tore at her chest, and the young woman started crying in earnest. She had failed them, and Hermione Granger did not take failure lightly. She had managed to get her parents through the war unscathed, but she had failed to protect them when they needed her the most.

Her magic started rushing forwards. Her parents' dresser flew against the opposite wall. Pieces of wood, clothing, and blankets swirled around the room. Hermione didn't have control anymore. She was scared, but there was nothing she could do to stop the onslaught of grief, anger, and magic from flowing through her. Her parents' belongings started to disintegrate one by one until she was surrounded by the ashes of her childhood. The last of her magic burst forth and ignited the dust, as well as the walls of her parent's rooms.

Suddenly she felt the familiar squeeze of apparition, and was gone.

* * *

Minerva McGonagall was staring out of the window of the Headmaster's office at the front gates of her beloved school. Earlier in the week, they had finished repairing the castle, but the scars of the war had not yet faded. They were planning to reopen the school this fall, but she knew not how many people would be coming back if any would come back at all. She knew exactly how many people had died on both sides. There would not be many students left.

A faint sound and movement just beyond the gates of Hogwarts caught her attention. Someone had appeared around ten feet in the air and fell to the ground with a sickening crack. Without thinking, the old woman apparated to the fallen figure.

To her surprise, it was Hermione Granger. The girl's leg was twisted at an odd angle and her clothes were badly burnt. Then the woman noticed the blood. She quickly sent a Patronus to Poppy and bent down to gently shake the girl.

"Ms. Granger, what happened?"

She didn't receive an answer, which worried her all the more. Minerva turned back to the castle and saw Poppy rushing across the castle grounds.

"Minerva? Whatever happened?"

"I don't know, I fear she was attacked."

"Let's get her up to the castle."

They levitated her prone form to the hospital wing and placed her on one of the new, pristine white cots. The mediwitch bustled around the girl nervously while the Headmistress sat in a nearby chair, a look of worry plastered on her face.

* * *

When Hermione awoke, she was confused and in pain. It wasn't normal pain, she noticed. She had been tortured with both a knife and the cruciatus curse, but nothing had ever come close to this before. It felt like she ached from the inside out. The safe comfort of sleep left her completely and the pain hit her full force.

She let out an ear piercing shriek that startled the mediwitch sitting next to her. The older woman jumped up and conjured straps that tethered her arms, legs, and head down to the table before pouring a potion down her throat. The matronly woman cooed and hushed as Hermione lost consciousness once more.

Hermione was drifting through unconsciousness when she was suddenly awoken. A man was pointing his wand at her. He looked familiar, but she couldn't place his face. She noticed she wasn't in pain, but she couldn't feel her body either. It felt strange being awake when she shouldn't have been. Her brain slowly began working and she realized that she must have been envennerated.

The man was talking to her, but what he was saying didn't make any sense. It sounded like he was talking from miles away.

"Ms. Granger, can you hear me?" The man said.

She nodded her head.

"What happened?" He asked.

Hermione tried to find her voice. It felt like hours before she could answer.

"Parents," was all she could get out.

"Did they die?" The man asked, no kindness or sympathy in his eyes.

She nodded again.

"Was it Death Eaters?" he asked.

Hermione shook her head.

"What was it then?"

Hermione could tell he was getting more and more annoyed, so she mustered her strength to speak again.

"Car-"

It was all she could get out before her world faded to black once again.

* * *

Once again, Hermione found herself forcibly awakened. The colors around her swam around. After a couple of minutes, everything came into view. She saw two familiar people, but she couldn't tell who.

"Don't make her talk, it's too much effort," came a voice from behind them.

"Oh Hermione, we are so sorry," The one with pretty green eyes spoke softly.

She vaguely wondered what a "Hermione" was.

"You are going to get through this, and we aren't going to leave you," the one with shocking red hair said.

"We love you," the green-eyed one said.

They both looked close to tears, and Hermione wished she knew who these people were and why they were so sad. Hermione felt tired all of the sudden and welcomed the comforting embrace of sleep.

* * *

This time, the young woman awoke on her own. She felt weak and tired. She braced for the terrible pain that had accompanied her first awakening, but none came.

Hermione turned on her side and saw a familiar freckled face sitting next to her. She tried to reach out to stroke his face but found she could barely move her arm. She cleared her throat, startling the boy sitting next to her. He rubbed his eyes and smiled at her. When he realized her eyes were open, he jumped out of his chair.

"Hermione! You're awake!" He shouted excitedly.

Hermione tried to speak, opening and closing her mouth without any words coming out.

"You hold on, I am going to get Madame Pomfrey."

He ran out of the white curtains cutting her off from the rest of the room. Hermione laid back and closed her eyes. She realized that her body was stiff and she might not be able to walk, even if she tried.

"I swear she was awake, Madame Pomfrey," Ron said.

"You were probably dreaming my dear, go up to your dorm."

Hermione, hearing the voices, opened her eyes. Poppy gasped and dropped whatever was in her hands.

"Ms. Granger, you're with us. How do you feel?"

"Water," Hermione said, her mouth feeling as dry as a bone.

Madame Pomfrey turned away and Hermione looked back at Ron.

"I've got to go get Harry," he said and dashed from the room.

Poppy came back with a cup of water and held it up to her lips. The cool liquid rushed into her mouth and dripped on her face. When she had drunk her fill, Madame Pomfrey pulled the cup away. She left Hermione's side and went back to her office. Hermione was alone with her thoughts for the first time in who knows how long. She wished she could see out of the windows so she could see what season it was, but they were covered by heavy and imposing drapes.

The doors of the hospital wing banged open and a figure in dark clothing strode into the room.

"Poppy," he said in a familiar voice, "has there been any change in Ms. Gra-"

The man glanced over to her bed and his question was cut short. Hermione finally recognized him.

"Professor Snape!" She exclaimed in a raspy voice.

"It seems as though you've regained your consciousness. That's good."

He rushed over to her bed and started casting diagnostic spells, muttering under his breath. He, too, left to confront Poppy in her office. She strained her ears to hear what was being said.

"Why didn't you alert me as soon as she woke?"

Snape seemed angry.

"She only just woke up. I was putting it on her chart and then I was going to owl you and Minerva."  
"What if she had slipped back into unconsciousness?"

"Now, Severus, you're being unreasonable."

Hermione's attention was torn away as her two best friends rushed to her side.

"Hermione," Harry whispered, tears in his eyes, "You really are awake."

The raven-haired boy leaned over and kissed her on the top of her head.

"We were here every night. We never left you alone, not once since we learned of your condition," He continued, giving her a knowing look.

She had flashbacks of their time "camping" in the Forest of Dean. She nodded to him.

"Thank you."

Hermione was starting to feel drowsy again. When her eyes started drifting closed, both of the boys' eyes widened and Ron ran from the bed.

"Pomfrey! She's closing her eyes."

Both Pomfrey and Snape rushed to her bedside. The mediwitch cast a spell and breathed a sigh of relief.

"She's just going to sleep, she must be exhausted. You boys should go upstairs and get some sleep."

"Ron, you go. I'll stay from here on out," Harry motioned for Ron to leave.

The last thing Hermione saw was Snape's eyes and the concern they held. She fell into a confused slumber.

* * *

Hermione came out of her fitful sleep and was confronted by an odd sight. Hermione and Ron were at the foot of her bed writing on make-shift desks. Hermione raised her head and cleared her throat. The boys looked up and looked sheepish when she raised her eyebrow.

"You see," Harry started, answering her unasked question, "you were asleep for so long, and we weren't going to leave you alone. So we just started doing our homework here. It kind of made us feel closer to you in a weird sort of way."

Hermione smiled, touched that her friends cared so much about her.

"I didn't know you guys would come back for your eighth year," She stated.

"We weren't. When we went to the Auror's office to apply, figuring that, you know, with the whole saving the wizarding world and everything, we would get the job right away. Apparently, no many times you've defeated Voldemort," Ron paused and threw a teasing look at Harry, "you still have to sit your N.E.W.T.S."

Hermione laughed and then grimaced in pain. Harry muttered about having to get Snape and left.

"Snape-" Hermione gave Ron a glare and he rolled his eyes, "Professor Snape has been overseeing your treatment. I never thought the man could care about anything, but you learn something new every day, I guess."

Ron turned back to his essay. Hermione wanted to get up and start walking around but found out that she could not move a muscle. She focused all of her attention on lifting her right arm. It seemed impossibly hard, but eventually, she raised it off of the hospital bed. Sweat started to bead on her forehead as she raised it more and more.

"Ms. Granger, you stop that this minute!" A deep voice exclaimed.

Snape walked over to her side and forced her hand down on the bed. He started muttering spells over her body. Hermione thought it was strange he would care so much. The professor caught Hermione looking at him, confusion in her eyes, scowled, and walked towards Poppy's office, robes billowing behind him.

A/n: I'll probably update tomorrow. I have an essay due today and I just want to play red dead redemption 2 honestly.


	2. In Which Hermione Recovers

**Chapter 2: In Which Hermione Recovers**

 **A/N: I super-appreciate everyone reading and reviewing. Knowing that people like what I write brings me happiness unlike anything else. Even people with constructive criticism, I am happy just thinking that people care about what I write. Thank You!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own, nor do I make any money from Harry Potter.**

Hermione looked at the professor's retreating back then turned to look at Ron.

"He's been like that ever since you passed out," Ron said with a grimace, "He is weirdly interested with what happened to you."

"I though that he… Died," she said.

"He was rescued by Malfoy," Ron replied.

"I thought Lucius died as well."  
"No he did. Draco," was all he said.

For some reason, this shocked Hermione, and she stared silently at Madame Pomfrey's office lost in thought. After a couple of minutes, Snape emerged and walked over to her bedside. He asked Ron to leave, and with only a wave of goodbye, Ron urgently packed his things and fled from the room. Hermione almost smiled at the way Ron rushed away. After all they had faced, Ron was still scared of his professor.

"Ms. Granger, there are some things that we need to discuss, and I suggest that you ready yourself for this conversation," Professor Snape looked coldly at her.

"Yes, I was wondering how long I was unconscious, it must have been a week or two. The curtains are closed so I can't see outside but—"

"It's April," The professor said bluntly.

Hermione's eyes opened comically wide and her mouth opened and closed like a fish. Then, as Severus Snape feared, the tears came.

"Now Ms. Granger, now is not the time for tears," the man chided.

His words did not stop them from coming. Not feeling comfortable with her tears, he did nothing but sit there and wait for them to stop. Hermione stopped crying after about fifteen minutes. She wiped her nose on her hospital gown then laid her hands in her lap.

"I missed my parent's funeral," She said in a quiet voice.

"It doesn't matter."

"It doesn't matter?" she repeated, "It doesn't matter!"

She started laughing hysterically. The pain and anger ran through her body in maniacal mirth. Professor Snape looked concerned.

"Stop this this instant!" He shouted her.

Hermione was instantly silenced. Snape rubbed his eyes, looking more tired than ever before. Hermione studied his face and realized that the man, underneath his tiredness, looked nervous. This discovery terrified Hermione.

"What else?" She asked.

He sighed, looking away from her. He picked up her familiar ivy wand and handed it to her. It felt dead in her hands. She started shaking again.

" _Aguamente!"_ she shouted.

Nothing happened.

"NO!" she screamed.

"Lumos!"

Her wand felt like a stick in her hands. Madame Pomfrey shooed him away and started fussing over Hermione. Her wand clattered to the hospital floor. Madame Pomfrey quickly poured a sedative down her throat and she was asleep.

* * *

"You shouldn't have done that!"

Madame Pomfrey had been shouting at Professor Snape for almost a full forty-five minutes. Snape was done listening to her and had been spacing out, but the middle-aged mediwitch was not listening to her.

"How do you suggest I should've done it?" He spat.

"I don't know, just not like you did."

Snape sighed.

"We didn't even know if her magic would work or not. It was better than telling her she might not have magic and then having her magic work. Imagine how furious she would have been."

Poppy sighed and shook her head.

"I don't have time for this," she started, "I am going to retire for the day. You watch over her."

And with that, Snape was alone with the unconscious room. He took out a book and sat next to the girl's bed. He tried to read, but he kept glancing at the sedated girl. Then Snape did something he hadn't done for a long time. He prayed to a God he didn't believe in that whatever had happened to Ms. Granger wasn't permanent.

* * *

Hermione woke up but kept completely still. Inside, she was shaking with rage. Everything in her life had gone wrong. She had lost her parents, her magic, and eight months of her life in one fell swoop. She slowly opened her eyes. Before her was Professor Snape, reading a book. She squinted, trying to read the book title.

The book snapped shut.

"Ms. Granger, how are you feeling?" He asked.

"Better."

He, once again, ran diagnostic spells over her. He frowned.

"You've lost quite a bit of muscle. Your recovery will be slow, but you will recover."

The emotionless delivery of her diagnosis made Hermione feel better. She knew Snape didn't care about her feelings. There was no fluff, and no reassurance. Only the facts.

"What book were you reading?" She asked.

"It's a muggle physical therapy book," he replied.

"And…" she trailed off.

"Ask your question," He snapped.

"What about my magic?"

Hermione started tearing up. She was going to lose control.

"Ms. Granger. You listen to me. There will be no more crying in my presence. I will be involved heavily in your recovery. I cannot have your fragil emotions flaring up every time you think about the things that have happened to you."

"Yes, professor." She replied.

"As far as your magic goes," he sighed, "I believe it is, though I do not know, like the pilot light went out on a furnace. That your magical core is there, but drained. Let's now focus on repairing your physical body before we worry about other matters."

"Why did they not take me to St. Mungo's?"

"Headmistress McGonagall thought that the magic in Hogwarts would help heal your magic, and so it would be unwise to move you. Though seeing as that didn't work, you are now a muggle and if the ministry was to learn of your condition, they would most likely wipe your memories and shove you back into the muggle world."

Hermione heard the truth in his statement. She thought, though only for an instance, that it would be better to be a muggle. She would not remember the war, her friends dying, being tortured, or any of the other monstrosities that she had witnessed in the time since she was eleven years old. But in the muggle world, she would have no one. Her parents were only children and her grandparents had all passed away. She had none of her childhood friends left. She was alone, in that aspect at least.

In the magical world, even without magic, she had the Weasleys, she had Harry, she had Headmaster McGonagall. She belonged here, and if there was a chance she could 'reignite' her magical core, if there was even the tiniest chance that Professor Snape was right, she was going to try harder than she had ever tried on anything.

She looked at Professor Snape. Hermione wondered to herself why he was helping her, why he was being almost…kind.

"I am not a nice man," He said, as if he was reading her mind, "but you remind me of someone that I know. I will help you with your current predicament, only if you follow my rules."

Hermione knew he was a guarded, mean, vicious man, but he was offering her help, he was offering to keep her loss of magic secret.

"Thank you, professor," she answered, "I promise to follow your rules to the best of my ability, though I cannot promise I won't be annoying with my questions."

"I will not tolerate questions about my personal life. You will follow my instructions to the letter. You will not question my techniques. You will not cry in my presence."

"Sounds doable."

Hermione smiled at the professor and, for a brief moment, she thought he smiled back.

* * *

A week and a half went by before Hermione was able to stand again. Harry and Ron came by every day after dinner to do homework and joke with her. They often brought games. Ron was always up for a game of wizard's chess, and Harry had found a liking for poker. While he usually wore his emotions on his sleeve, he had a remarkable poker face.

She spent the hours between Professor Snape's classes in physical therapy. She knew he was trying to be kind, but sometimes his professor persona slipped through. She made great leaps in her recovery, but it was not going fast enough for her even with the muscle-regrowth potion.

"Professor, most wizards recover faster than this, especially with the potions. Why is this taking so long?"

"Ms. Granger, you should know this. Potions work mainly by interacting with your magical core. You have none. They will not work as fast."

She nodded her head.

"Are you ready?" He asked.

At her assent, he helped her off the bed. She was still wobbly on her feet, but when the professor let go, she as able to stand up by herself. Snape stepped away from her and cast a cushioning charm on the space between them.

"Walk towards me," He commanded.

Hermione put most of her weight on one foot and felt her knee buckle. She tried again, one the other foot, and she almost lost balance.

"Walk towards me," He said, louder.

"I can't," she gasped.

There were almost tears in her eyes as she grasped the hospital bed ad slowely started sinking to her knees.

"Are you weak Ms. Granger?" He asked, seething.

She glared at him, stopping her downward motion.

"You have done nothing but show me that you are a weakling Ms. Granger. You only want to do what is easy. You have no desire to walk, no desire to get your magic back. I may as well alert the ministry now."

He sneered at her. Hermione deepened her glare and pushed herself all the way back on her feet. Her legs wobbled, but she quickly corrected herself. She took a small step towards him. Then another. She slowly but surely closed the six-foot distance between them. She stood, her face so close to his that she could feel his breath on her face. She jutted her chin towards him, fire in her eyes.

"I. Am. Not. Weak." She bit out.

The edges of his lips turned up into a smile. Hermione's legs had exerted themselves and collapsed beneath her. Snape caught her, grasping underneath her armpits. She looked up, wonder in her eyes.

"I can walk!" she said, excitedly.

Snape blew air through his nose, in what Hermione took as a laugh.

"Never underestimate a spiteful woman."

He guided her back to bed and dropped a book in her lap. It looked old, and there was no title on the cover.

"I will be here tomorrow at noon. If the weather is fair, Potter and Weasley have convinced me to take you down to the lake."

He swept from the room. Before the door to the hospital wing was closed, she was absorbed in the book.

* * *

Hermione was up at six in the morning, a she had done every day since before she remembered. Poppy brought her breakfast and an assortment of potions at six thirty sharp. The hours ticked by slowly. Eventually noon came and three familiar faces walked into the hospital room.

"Ready Hermione?" Harry asked.

Hermione smiled and nodded. Harry helped her out of bed and grasped her by the waste. Ron stepped by him and took the other side. They helped her out of the room and to the stairs. Snape followed close behind. In front of the stairs, they cast a featherweight charm on her and carried her down the stairs.

Slowly but surely, they made their way down to the lake. It was a sunny and warm almost-summer day. She hadn't been outside for almost a year, she realized. She looked down at her arms and saw her pale skin was glowing in the sun.

"You look like a light house," Harry laughed.

It seemed like most of the students from the castle were by the lake, splashing in the shallows. Harry sat down next to her while Ron ran to splash a girl. She splashed back then leaped up to kiss him.

"Hannah Abbot?" she asked.

"They just click, I guess," Harry shrugged.

"They fit well," Hermione said, "but their children will be even more ginger."

The two friends laughed together. Harry shyly grasped her hand.

"Harry… What about Ginny?"

"She…Couldn't wait for me, I guess. When the battle was over, she said that I abandoned her. She started dating Dean…"

"I am sorry Harry, but I can't be someone's second. We slept together, and you said her name. You have no idea how much that hurt me. That when you took my virginity you were thinking of someone else."

"I understand, but you will always be my best friend."

He dropped her hand, kissed her cheek, and ran towards the lake.

Snape was looking on, his cheeks slightly flushed, having heard the whole conversation. He knew women who would fall apart for less. He realized that Hermione was looking at him.

"I think I am starting to get sun-sick," she said, "Would you please take me back?"

He looked at her tired face and nodded. He took her hand and lifted her up, carrying her back up to the hospital wing. By the time they got back up to Poppy's domain, Hermione was a sleep in his arms. He gently set her down on the bed. His hand accidentally brushed through her hair and he silently reflected that it felt wiry, like sheep's wool. Snape quickly shook his head and retreated to the dungeon to grade papers.


	3. In Which Everything Seems to be Getting

**Chapter 3: In Which Everything Seems to be Getting Better**

 **A/N: Hey readers! Sorry about the confusion last time. I usually use three astrics for scene breaks, but they weren't showing up. I fixed it. Thank you guys for your patience. I was having a tough time with school and then we had a family emergency. I am back now. I'll be posting at least once a week.**

The weeks passed relatively quickly. The boys came less and less now that N.E.W.T.S. were getting closer. Hermione spent a majority of her day rebuilding her weakened muscles and reading in the library. On the last day of the semester, when Hermione awoke there was a note on the side table of her hospital bed.

 _Ms. Granger,_

 _Please come to my office at Eleven O'clock sharp. If you need help, Severus may escort you._

 _Headmistress McGonagall_

Hermione wondered what the stern woman needed from her as she got out of bed and walked towards the adjourning showers in the hospital wing. Once she was done readying herself, she walked towards the kitchen, tickled the pear and entered. The house elves were busying themselves, getting ready for the leaving feast.

She grabbed a piece of fruit and after checking the time, Hermione decided that it was safe to head to the library.

Hermione, arriving at the library, walked past Madame Pince and went to the restricted section. She spent several minutes browsing the books before selecting the one that she was looking for. She opened the book and started reading where she left off. The book, _Theory of Magical Cores,_ sounded useful at first, but seemed to contain nothing of the sort, only pureblood propaganda about how muggleborns steal pureblood's magic.

She paced while she read. She rarely sat down if she could help it. Every time she voluntarily sat down she felt restless and helpless. Absorbed in the book, she ran right into something solid.

"Watch it, Granger," a deep voice whispered.

"Malfoy," Hermione nodded her head.

She had noticed him in the library the last few weeks, watching her. Hermione brushed past the blond man, but before she could get away, he caught her by the upper arm.

"You look better," he said, his eyes downcast, "And I am sorry, for what happened to you. And for all the things I…" He trailed off into the distance.

They made eye contact and realized he knew about her magic. She also saw the regret in his tortured eyes. He looked tired and distraught.

She put her hand on his other shoulder and looked him straight in the eyes.

"You have never been a nice or good person, Malfoy."

The man before looked quickly at the floor, feeling rejection coming on.

"But, I know you can be better. And you have my forgiveness for everything you have done."

"Everything?" he asked, his hand trailing down to her right forearm where her scar was.

 _She was instantly transported back, when she was being tortured by Bellatrix. The knife carved out her flesh, and Hermione was crying. She had stopped screaming, her voice too raw to continue. Her pain filled eyes turned towards Draco Malfoy. He had been awful to her in school, but she had never thought that he could be capable of standing by and letting this happen._

' _please,' she mouthed._

 _The man's eyes filled with dread and he discretely shook his head._

Her pause created uncertainty in Malfoy, and he looked anxious to get away. Hermione sighed.

"Yes, Malfoy, everything."

He seemed to completely deflate, relief filling his eyes.

"Hermione Granger, pleased to meet you," she said and stuck out her hand.

Malfoy smiled, recognizing a chance when it was given to him.

"Draco Malfoy, also a pleasure," he responded, grasping her hand firmly.

They tentatively smiled at each other, and after their handshake ended, Malfoy turned to leave.

"See you around, Gr—Hermione," He said.

"See you," she responded.

A moment after he was out of sight, she glanced down at her watch, put the book back and headed towards the headmistress' office, feeling out of sorts from their surreal conversation.

* * *

It took her a solid half hour to reach the top of the tower and by the time she got there she was exhausted. She gave the password and was greeted by Headmistress McGonagall and Professor Snape having tea.

"You should have asked for my help," Snape started, "you could have set your recovery back weeks!"

"I took it slow, I promise professor," she answered before gracefully taking the other chair.

"I have some good news, Ms. Granger," Minerva looked at her.

"Professor Binns has…Moved on and we are in desperate need of a new History of Magic Professor."

The older woman shuffled papers in front of her, then picked up a sheet.

"N.E.W.T.s in arithmancy, transfiguration, potions, charms, history of magic, care of magical creatures, herbology and astrology. In fact, you took every N.E.W.T. offered except divination, not to mention you took them a full year before anyone in your class."

Professor Snape snorted.

Minerva continued, "Though we usually require further schooling in order for people to become professors, in this case, an exception can be made. Hermione, would you like to be the new History of Magic Professor?"

Hermione beamed at the older woman.

"Of course!" Hermione answered breathlessly.

For the first time in a long time, Hermione felt more than just the need to survive.

* * *

After all the paperwork was signed, Hermione was directed to move to her quarters behind her new office. All of her worldly possessions were located in her beige-and-cream-colored quarters. She set to work, having to manually unpack all of her belongings.

She was tired and run down by the time she was done. Before long, she was alerted to someone knocking on her door. She opened it up and there was Professor Snape.

"Come in, professor," She said, gesturing inside of her office.

He looked disdainfully around the room and at the desk at the far end.

"Leave it up to McGonagall to give you a bigger office."

Hermione looked around and realized that indeed, her office was bigger than most. She immediately felt awful, she knew she was a new teacher and she needed to earn her place.

"No need to look so horrified, Professor Granger, I am sure that you will earn your keep."

"Oh, professor, before I forget, could you help me with color-changing charms."

Snape rolled his eyes, but pulled out his wand, ready to help. He looked horrified when she opened the door behind her office and gestured inside. He looked around her room, feeling embarrassed from being in such an intimate space.

"I want the walls to be a yellowish-cream, except for that one, I want that one to be lavender. And I want the trim to be lavender."

The dark man sighed and raised his wand, casting the necessary charm. He watched the girl look around, and seeming satisfied, he started to walk away.

"Wait, the purple is not quite right. It needs to be a little lighter."

He grumbled and cast the charm again.

"A little lighter still, just a shade."

"I swear, Professor Granger, my time does not need to be wasted like this."

He cast the charm one last time, then turned to leave. He barely caught her saying something about it being too light before he was out of the room.

* * *

Hermione was asleep when she was notified that there was someone knocking on her door, again. She had been so exhausted when Snape left that she immediately collapsed into her bed. She got up and opened the door from her room to her office, took a deep breath and opened the outer door.

Harry and Ron engulfed her in a hug before pushing past her to look at her office.

"Wow Hermione, you're a teacher," Ron said.

"Thank you for stating the obvious, Ronald," she replied good-naturedly.

"You'll be great, 'Mione, you've been teaching us since halfway through first year. In any case, you'll be better than the old ghost," Harry jested.

The raven-haired boy reached down and squeezed her hand. Ron caught the gesture and looked into Hermione's eyes knowingly.

"Professor McGonagall sent us to say you need to be at the feast in an hour," Harry said after a moment pause.

"Can I talk to her alone?" Ron asked Harry.

Harry gestured in an 'of course' manner before swiftly exiting the room.

"I know about you two," Ron said.

"Oh, Ron, I am so sorry, we didn't mean to make everything awkward."

"Stop it, Hermione. That's not what I meant. Harry has had a crush on you for forever. Since you rescued Sirius, we played truth or dare, the magic kind. When I came back, after I… left, he seemed happy, too happy. But you don't love him, do you?"

Hermione teared up.

"I don't know what I was thinking," She gasped, "I just felt so alone and broken after you left, and Harry has always just been there. I have been wracked with guilt ever since."

"He knows, Hermie."

She glared at him.

"He knew you didn't love him when you guys… spent the night. That's on him. Don't make it weird."

Hermione was lost in thought as her friend left the room.

* * *

She wrestled with her hair, wanting to make a good impression on her future students. When she was done, she scarcely threw a look at the mirror before exiting her rooms. She slowly stalked the halls, not wanting to tire herself out. She reached the teacher's entrance to the great hall and opened the door. No one noticed as she took her seat.

She was sat between Flitwick and Snape, and luckily for her at least one of the pair was good conversation. She was roused from her conversation with the short wizard by McGonagall standing at the podium and tapping her glass repeatedly.

"Our first year after the war has come to an end, and with it we have new hope," McGonagall started.

Hermione stared nervously at the crowd. She realized that people were looking at her curiously.

"Everyone may be wondering why Ms. Granger is sitting with the teachers," the Scottish woman, "Professor Binns has passed on and Ms. Granger will be filling the post."

There was complete silence. For a moment Hermione was terrified no one would want her to be their teacher. Then Ron, Harry, and Ginny started clapping. The entire hall broke out in applause. Chants of 'Professor Granger' rang out. She saw Harry motion for her to stand up and she complied, bowing before she sat down. McGonagall said a few more words before clapping her hands, causing food to appear.

The next morning, she helped escort everyone to the train station safely. She received lots of well-wishes and words of support. Even some of the Slytherins accepted her with kind words, though she thought that it might be because of Mal—Draco.

After all the children were loaded on board and she had wished goodbye to her two best friends, promising to visit them soon, she sought out Snape, who was just in front of her. She called out to him.

"Sir, could you please escort me to my hometown, I have some business to take care of."

"Now?" he asked.

"Please."

The older man sighed, but complied, motioning her to step to the side of the train.

Severus looked at the scrap of paper with coordinates on it and concentrated, holding on to the young woman's arm. They appeared in front of a dilapidated house, charred, with police tape around it.

"I burnt down my house," He heard her mutter.

She shook her head and walked down the street. Without any prompting, Severus followed her. It felt as if they had been walking for miles when she turned abruptly into a driveway and entered a building. Though he had not been in one since his childhood, he immediately recognized it as a post office. He watched his almost-companion walk to a small box, take out a key, and opened it. Letters spilled out of it. She grabbed them and walked over to the counter to sift through them, dropping some along the way.

Severus walked behind her, picking the dropped ones up and placed them on the counter next to her. She went through them quickly. Three of them were separate from the rest. She scooped the largest pile and threw it in the trash, muttering about 'junk mail'. She quickly opened the three letters. Severus came to stand behind her.

"What are those?"

"Insurance checks," she said, "My parents' solicitor must have sent them to me when he couldn't contact me. His bill is in that pile there."

"Six hundred thousand pounds for your house!" Severus exclaimed.

Granger turned towards him.

"My parents were always paranoid. Cautious was the way that they put it."

Hermione pulled out a small beaded bag and shoved the still-large pile of mail into it, but carefully folded the checks and put them in her pocket.

"One more stop, then we can head to Diagon Ally," she said.

Severus was worried. The girl in front of him seemed deflated, and though he knew he should not—could not—worry about Granger, his brow still furrowed in concern. They came upon a suite of buildings and Granger pulled out keys to unlock the doors. She went over to a phone. Severus watched her dial curiously.

"Yes, Samsons Office?" She asked in a questioning tone.

She made several more grunts that sounded like 'yes' before saying something about accepting an offer. Granger hung up the phone with a clang.

"Samson has been trying to buy my parents practice for years now, I guess everyone gets what they want."

She paused, looking around the room with haunted eyes.

"Let me lock the doors and we can aparate from here."

When she was done, she held on to his arm. He put his hand over hers and looked at her, wanting to convey sympathy, but didn't know how. She didn't seem to notice and so he pictures Diagon Ally and Disappeared with a 'pop'.

* * *

Hermione was grateful to be back in her room. Snape had been acting weirdly all afternoon. She was glad he had taken her out though. She was used to being on her guard with the surely professor so when she had to open her parent's life insurance checks or make the horrid phone call to Samson she didn't break down. All through the shopping trip she took with Snape he was watching her. She could feel his eyes on her back.

Hermione collapsed onto her bed with a sigh. All she wanted was to fall asleep. But she had lesson plans to make and classes to organizes, and so she forced herself out of bed and went into her office.

* * *

Minerva McGonagall sat at her own desk going over numbers. The school shamefully hadn't paid Binns since his death, so scrounging up the money for Ms. Granger was difficult. Minerva knew she needed the job more than anyone, and so she was looking anywhere there could be for extra money.

Minerva briefly thought about raising tuition. She pulled out a scroll. It was shorter than she had ever seen it in her years working at the school. On it were ten names. Only two were from magic parents, and even then, they were half-bloods. She sighed, putting her head in her hands, not knowing what she was going to do.

* * *

The newly elected Shacklebolt was looking at the same numbers, the same thoughts going through his head. He knew there were things they could do, horribly outdated though they were. He silently hoped by the time that this was done, he wouldn't be assassinated.

The bill the Wizengamot passed was put before him, and he wished he could veto it. It seemed like there was nothing else to do. He picked up a blood quill and closing his eyes, signed it. His signature flashed golden before fading back into black.

The minister watched as the bill vanished to the archives, where it would be kept for safety. For hours Kingsly's eyes were glued to the spot on the desk, the same sentence running through his head again and again and again.

 _There was nothing else I could do._


	4. In Which A Storm Breaks

**Chapter 4: In Which the Storm Breaks**

Sometimes Hermione forgot about her _disability._ She would try to do something, whether that was try a new spell she was reading about in a book or just trying to summon something. However, every time she made contact with her wand she was painfully reminded that she was no longer a part of the world that she held dear, no longer a part of the world she had risked her life to save.

Hermione spent the summer months in turmoil. She was in a place she loved so dearly, surrounded by some of the most intellectual minds in the world, but she couldn't use her magic, and she had to constantly make up excuses to the point that she was avoiding everyone besides the headmistress.

Hermione often saw Snape in the library. Her physical therapy was through and so he was regarding her in the same cold and distant manner he had when she was a child, though without the bitter remarks about her intellect. She often caught him staring at her, a pondering look on his face, but as soon as he noticed she was looking back at him, he dropped his head.

The summer melted away into fall. The teachers that had been on vacation returned in mid-august. Hermione was not as lonely as she had been before and often times felt more content than not.

sshgsshgsshgsshgsshg

Severus Snape hated the time before the start of the semester. There were no students to distract the other imbecilic teachers and so during their mandatory breakfasts, they were reduced to asking him questions and otherwise trying to draw him into a conversation.

This particular morning was no different. Professor Vector tried to draw him in with some gossip she found in the Daily Prophet. He stoically ignored her and directed his full attention to his breakfast. He didn't even acknowledge an owl as it dropped an envelope above his plate.

He was drawn out of his thoughts as he heard a strangled cry of pain from further down the table. His head shot up and whipped towards his left. He barely caught the tail end of Granger's cloak as she fled from the hall. He glanced around the table and saw no other professor get up to find out what was wrong with the over-emotional girl.

He searched high and low for her but couldn't find her in her usual spots. He felt utterly disturbed that he knew where she usually was. He had been subconsciously watching her more than he normally would be aware of another person. He idly wondered just how much information he had stored about the girl.

When he couldn't find her, he called a house elf, who told him that she was in the astronomy tower. A trill of fear when through his spine as he swept his cloak around him and fled towards the most northern part of the building.

It seemed that it was eons before he reached the tower and he breathed a sigh of relief. She was still there, sitting on the edge of one of the windowless openings. He stared at her hair flapping lightly in the autumn wind.

"I can't believe that they can make us do this."

Granger had obviously sensed him walk in.

"Professor Granger, please come out of the window."

She shook her head and kept staring away from him. He saw something that was dropped in the middle of the room. He picked it up, unfolding the sheets of paper.

 _Ms. Hermione Granger:_

 _This letter was sent by the ministry of magic to inform you of an upcoming law that will be effective on September 1 of this year. The law is attached, and non-compliance will be punished by 50 years in Azkaban or permanent removal of magic. Thank you for your compliance._

 _Sandra Bones_

Snape tossed the page to the floor, engrossed in reading.

 _Magical Community Revitalization Act_

 _Article 1_

 _1.1: Each eligible person (eligibility determined in section 5.4) will be matched to another eligible person by the_ par magicae _spell._

 _1.2: Those matched will be required to produce at least four offspring in ten years, and each couple will be allotted funds after each child is born. The funds are dependent on number of offspring already produced and current financial standing. (see Article 3)_

 _1.3: Marriage, while not necessary, is believed to be important in our community, and so an initial payment of 40,000 galleons will be made after the ceremony is complete and an additional 1,000 galleons will be awarded after an annual inspection each year until the last offspring the match will produce reaches the age of 11._

Severus tore his eyes away from the page and stared at the girl.

"How barbaric," he said out loud, hoping to comfort her.

Snape stood in the middle of the room, knowing that there was nothing he could do for the girl at the moment. If she jumped, he was ready with a featherweight charm and a harsh scolding. He let his mind wander for what seemed like hours.

 _Why is this called the astronomy tower when the astronomy classes are held on the roof of the west wing._ He pondered for a moment before noticing a movement out of the corner of his eyes. The girl was climbing off the window sill and into the tower. He restrained himself from sighing with relief.

"Are you over your petty foolishness?"

"I would think that being turned into breeding stock is allowed to illicit some sort of reaction from me." She responded in a deadened voice.

Severus saw her eyes shift around and then settle on her face. She had a look in her eye that terrified him more than anything in his life. More than staring into the eyes of the Dark Lord. She knew something that he didn't. Something important.

She thrust a sheet of paper into his hands.

 _Ms. Hermione Granger:_

 _Listed bellow is your 'match', the person who you will be required to reproduce with…_

Severus skimmed down to the bottom, where a name was written in bold italics.

Severus Snape.

He thought his heart might have stopped. How dare the ministry control his life. His thoughts turned towards the girl. That is why she was so afraid.  
"Get out." He said in a strained voice.

She gathered her papers and ran out of the room, not wanting to be there for his inevitable explosion.

Sshgsshgsshgsshgsshgsshgsshgsshgsshgsshg

Hermione arrived at the door of her office out of breath. She unlocked the door, ran to her private quarters and flung herself on her bed. She wanted to cry herself to sleep but was too scared. After she lost her magic she thought she would never feel whole again but with this new law… When she was sitting in the astronomy tower she thought she was actually going to jump.

"Oh child, everything is going to be OK."

The soft Scottish voice startled her out of her stupor. She looked at the headmistress and saw sadness and regret in her eyes.

"You knew about this." Hermione whispered.

"I knew about the law, not who would be matched to whom. I wasn't going to tell you because I thought—I had hoped—that because that your magic was gone that you wouldn't be matched."

"It's Snape," Hermione said.

"I know, he told me."

There was a silence before Minerva started talking again.

"He has the capacity to care, you know, you just have to force him to."

"I don't want him to care!" She yelled, "I want everything to be normal. I want my magic back and I want to be able to leave the castle and hang out with my friends and go on to be a charms apprentice, but I can't! not only do I not have magic, I have been reduced to having kids and raising them by myself because I will not trust Snape to watch my kids after how he treated us as kids. My life is over, Minerva. It's no longer my own."

"Oh, dear, it's going to be all right—"

There was a knock on the door and Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Seems like everyone can just come to my room whenever they please. Not only to I have to have SEX with Snape but I am no longer allowed privacy whatsoe—Harry!" she exclaimed.

The Boy Who Lived was standing outside of her room, tears in his eyes, clutching his ministry letter in his hands.

"Time for you to leave, Headmistress."

"How did you get into the castle Mr. Potter?"

"I think that now is not the time for questions, Minerva."

The older woman looked baffled that Hermione would have taken that tone with her but looking at the both of them thought it better to leave the both of them alone. Letting out a quiet huff, she left the room.

Hermione beckoned Harry into her quarters and he collapsed onto her bed. She sat silently, waiting for him to talk. Harry took a deep breath. Then another.

"I can't have kids. Ever."

Hermione sucked in her breath and gently tried to pry the letter from his hands. After she successfully un-crumpled the paper, she started reading at a lightning pace.

"Harry that's untrue. You just... can't have magical children."

"It says further on that because of that I can not marry anyone with magical blood. Not even a muggleborn." He said, looking at her hopefully.

"See, you still can have a family, Harry. You just have to start dating in the muggle world."

"How will I even accomplish that? I don't know anyone in the muggle world. And I have to keep almost everything about me secret. Yes, on our wedding day I'll say 'oh by the way magic exists and I defeated a dark lord twice and we're going to have to deal with things like the paparazzi and weird people trying to break into our house.'"

"Well, I didn't say it would be easy."

"I just don't know what to do, Hermione. I feel like my whole life I have had a purpose, you know? I feel like I have already peaked. Is it downhill from here? Do I fade into obscurity until I am as crazy as Mad-eye was?"  
"I think Mad-eye was just born crazy."

Harry burst out laughing. Hermione joined him as they both were reduced to tears.

"Can you imagine," Harry started, but was interrupted by Hermione giggling harder, "Moody being born, and he looks his mother straight in the eye. 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE.'" He yelled

"Harry!" Hermione yelled indignantly but broke out in laughter again.

HGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSS

Severus was having a hard time trying to cope. He couldn't have sex with one of his former students. But he couldn't go to Azkaban, nor could he give up his memories and his magic. Not after everything he had been through.

He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. He was going to do it. There was no way around it. After Hermione broke the news to him he had read the law in full. It was air tight. They had obviously been crafting it since after the war ended.

He thanked God that the marriage clause was not mandatory, though they had adequate precedents to draw from. Wizarding marriages were permanent because after the magical cores were bound, there was no separating them. He would just have to

Severus sighed, stood up, and went to grab his decanter. He contemplated grabbing a glass, but instead brought the whole thing back with him to his chair by the fireplace. Something was niggling in the back of his head. Then, in a rush, he jumped up and ran into his personal library. Grabbing a thick black tome, he opened it and started reading, completely forgetting about drowning his problems in brandy.

SSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHG

Hermione and Harry lay on her bed together, naked and still panting from their activities. Harry turned towards Hermione and brushed the hair that was sticking to her sweaty forehead. Hermione looked into Harry's smiling, content face and was stricken with guilt.

"Harry..." Hermione started.

"Hermione let me enjoy this, please."

"Harry," she said with a warning tone.

"I know, okay, I know."

Harry turned away from her, but Hermione put her hand on his shoulder and he turned back around.

"I know you don't love me, Hermione. And I know I probably shouldn't be taking advantage of you like this, but I love you. I have loved you since fourth year. I just don't know if I can keep myself from loving you."

"But Harry, with this law… I have to have…sex… with…"

Hermione cringed, not wanting to finish the sentence or even think about the act.

"Snape, I know." Harry said.

"How—"

"I was outside your door for longer than I care to admit. Well basically the whole time. And you and Minerva weren't being quiet."

"And you're okay with this?" She asked.

"Well, you could be getting married to Malfoy."

Hermione shuddered.

"Right? But no, that pleasure goes to Luna."

"No!" Hermione gasped.

"Yes!" Harry mimicked, "I ran into Narcissa—"

"You're on a first name basis?"

"A lot has changed hasn't it? And well, they're technically family. But anyways she said that she was relieved it was Luna actually."

"Really!"

"Yes, that 'she's a bit off but she'll mellow him out.'"

"The world has gone insane!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Snape will take care of you. He took care of you while you were in a coma and he will take care of you through this."

"I don't want him to!"

"I know, I heard. But there is no going back to normal after this. After everything that has happened. We're not in third year anymore, you know?"

They were silent for several minutes, both lost in their own thoughts.

"Why would you, you know," Harry gestured between them, "If you didn't love me?"

"Harry, I do love you—"

"As a friend," he grimaced.

Hermione huffed, "There was a war going on! Ron left us and I felt so alone and depressed. I wanted to feel something good. And I'll remind you that you came onto me."

"Oh, come on. 'Dance with me Harry!'" He mimicked Hermione's voice.

Hermione blushed bright red.

"And that doesn't explain right now."

"Well, you are attractive…"

"Oh, my dear lady, you hurt me so."

"Okay. We took advantage of each other. But it's not going to happen again."

Harry put his hand on her waist, glancing down at her breasts.

"Surely once more won't hurt."  
"Harry…"

"We are already naked." He kissed her neck. "And you did say I was handsome." He kissed underneath her ear. "It can't hurt."

Hermione enthusiastically crashed her lips onto his. He rolled her over on her back and struggled to get untangled from the sheets. Hermione giggled, looking up at him through hooded eyes. He let out a soft animalistic growl before kissing her once again.

SSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSHG

"That was the last time." Hermione said firmly, changing into her silk pajamas.

Harry was silently smiling at her.

"Harry!"

"I'm sorry. I can't promise anything."

She huffed.

"Hey… Can I stay here?"

"Why?"

"I can't stay in Grimauld Place. Too many memories. I am going to sell it I think."

"Oh…Sure. But into the study for you."

He looked at her bed.

"No! Into the study. Transfigure something."

Harry shook his head, still smiling and walked into the study.

 **A/N: Ok I promise that the SS/HG stuff will start soon and Harry will get over Hermione. I promise.**


	5. In which Hearts are Shattered

**A/N: College, man. I'll try to be more frequent with uploads.**

 **Thank you for the positive reviews, they keep me going.**

 **WARNING! There is sexual content in this chapter, as well as a brief mention of noncom(no depiction), and lots of alcohol consumption.**

 **In Which Hearts are Shattered.**

Severus looked down the High Table, hoping to catch a glimpse of the now elusive Granger. He hadn't seen her since the day in the astronomy tower, not that he had been looking. He wanted, no, needed to talk to her.

He stood up, pushing his chair back loudly. She had missed nine faculty-mandatory meals, meals even he had to attend. He looked at Minerva, who was talking to Flitwick. He stormed over to her.

"Where is she?" He said through his teeth.

"Whatever do you mean, Severus?" She answered coyly.

"Now is not the time, woman. You know of our situation and time can not be wasted."

"Where do you think she is? Honestly Severus, if you use your brain every once in a while your life would be much better."

With this, he swirled around, the effect much diminished as the faculty were used to his theatrics and there were no students yet to terrify.

HGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSS

Hermione was in the library with Harry reading the Magical Community Revitalization documents and the precedents that came before it, making the current law possible. She looked up from her heavy tome and stared at Harry. They hadn't slept together since the last time, and Hermione felt like she was starting to miss being that close to someone.

She didn't know why the Headmistress had let him stay that long, but she wasn't going to complain. Perhaps it was because he was Harry Potter and Harry Potter could stay wherever he pleased, and no one would dare kick him out of anywhere. She huffed at the thought.

"Let's go do something fun," Harry whined, wiggling his eyebrows up and down.

"Harry the deadline of this whole thing is in two weeks and I want to make sure that there is absolutely no way to beat it before I have to…" She paused, loosing her train of thought, "To sleep with Snape."

She spat out his name like it was absolutely disgusting. She looked into Harry's eyes and saw that he was terrified, staring at something behind her. Knowing who it must be, Hermione's heart leaped into her throat as she stood up, causing her books to fall to the floor. She whipped around and was met with two coal-black eyes.

"I would like to speak with you, _privately_ ," He said, his voice low and dangerous.

"Of course, Professor," She answered.

The man turned around and started walking out of the library. Hermione started to follow him, and she heard Harry tell her he would clean up their station. Hermione nodded at him gratefully before quickening her pace to catch up to her terrifying professor.

The walk down into the dungeons was ominous. Every level they descended caused Hermione to become a little more terrified. They turned several corners and walked past the Slytherin's dormitory entrance. From there Hermione took extra precautions memorizing the turns, just in case she would have to escape.

Eventually they walked down a long, narrow hallway and stopped half way. Snape uttered a password that Hermione couldn't quite catch, and a door appeared. Snape pushed it open to reveal a small living area with a couch, fireplace, and bookshelves. She walked in and Snape closed the door behind her.

"I do not appreciate it when you discuss our situation with other people."

"Well it's rough when you won't even talk to me," She retorted.

"You're the one avoiding me!" He shouted, "You're the one skipping meals and staying cooped up in your room."

"Those are the only places I could be, so you were not looking hard enough."

Hermione could tell that he was seething, and so she jut her chin up in the air, as if she was daring him to do something about it. The man turned around and went to a table in the corner of the room. She heard liquid being poured. When he turned back around, there was a dark liquid in the glass. Hermione watched as he drank all of it in one gulp. He sat the glass back down on the table.

"Ms. Granger, I have a theory about your loss of magic. The spell that the ministry used to match us together, Par Magicae, only works on those with magic in their veins, no matter how depleted they are. Do you know much about mutual binding ceremonies?"

"Yes," She answered, nervous of where this conversation was going.

"So you know that when a mutual binding is performed, the pair's magical cores mix, only for a moment, and then they are bound for life. I theorize that if you were to complete a binding ceremony then your magic might… Restart, for lack of a better word."

Hermione's lips formed into a small 'o' as her brain was processing the information.

"Additionally, I think that the…act should be done tonight, the children will be arriving tomorrow and I don't want to…while children are in the castle."

Hermione could almost see the blush rise in his cheeks.

"I have brewed the strongest fertility potion I can find, so hopefully we only have to sleep together four times over the course of the next ten years."

Hermione nodded, not really comprehending the situation.

"Good, meet me here an hour after dinner."

SSHGSSHGSSHGSSHGSSHG

Harry watched Hermione pace the room uneasily. There was a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't let her do this.

"I can't do this," she said.

Harry opened his mouth to speak.

"But I have to do this," She turned the other way, walking towards the window.

Back and forth, back and fourth she went. Harry, watching her eventually got fed up.

"Leave now or you're going to be late!" He shouted at Hermione.

Hermione turned around and stared blankly at Harry. He saw tear well up in her eyes and her face contort into an odd shape. He tried to say something as she walked over to her dresser and downed the fertility potion. She grabbed her coat and left the room, pausing only briefly. Harry took this opportunity to walk up behind her and grab her from behind, hugging her to him.

"Please don't go," He whispered in her ear.

She shook her head and left his grasp. Harry felt as if his heart shattered in two as she left the entrance of her room through the door in her office to the outer corridor. She faded from view and Harry sank down to his knees.

SSHGSHGSSHGSSHG

Hermione was livid by the time she arrived at Snape's quarters. Fuming, she knocked on the door. A disheveled Snape answered the door. She was greated by a puff of breath that smelled so heavily of brandy she had to repress the urge to gag.

"You're drunk," she deadpanned.

"You're Hermione," he answered.

Kidding or not, Hermione felt the urge to grin. She pushed past him into the living room and he followed her.

"I don' like that you're here."

"I don't want to be here."

He was so obviously far gone that Hermione felt uncomfortable at the concept of sleeping with him. Walking over to a table with a bottle of brandy on it, she saw a consent form.

"I imagine you will be rather drunk tonight and I don' wan' you to say that I-That I-"

"I understand, Mr. Snape."

She signed it with ease before picking up the bottle of brown alcohol and putting it to her lips. She saw Snape move to stop her, but then he just sat back and watched her pull long drags. When she was finished, she sputtered from the taste.

"That was a 21 year Hibiki," He slurred.

She gasped and set the bottle down.

"You owe me like three hundered pounds."

Hermione stared at him in complete shock before realizing there was a slight curve to his lip. She sat neatly on the couch until the alcohol seemed to take effect. She looked at Snape, her head tilted at an odd angle.

"You're not that bad," she was starting to slur her words.

"I am very bad," he answered.

She moved to touch his face but he pulled away. She leaned in for a kiss, closing her eyes and puckering slightly, feeling emboldened by the alcohol. When it never came she opened her eyes. Snape was across the room. She was confused.

Standing up she said, "What's wrong, we have to do this, you said so."

"I don' wan' to. You're my former student and it is immoral."

"Would you rather me be sent out into the muggle world without my memories or magic?"

"No," he mumbled.

"Is it that I am unnatractive?" Hermione was starting to feel the full effects of the alcohol now, as she hadn't eaten much for dinner and her insecurities were coming out, along with the water works.

"No!" he half shouted.

"Then what is it, Snape?" she said.

When he didn't answer, she repeated the question.

"What is it, Severus?"

"I don' wanna be a father!" He shouted at her, "Mine was no example and I promised myself to never subject another human being."

"You're not your father," she said quietly.

"I am exactly like my father," he answered firmly, end of question.

"No you're not," She was louder this time, more defiant.

She hadn't realized they had gotten so close and was shocked when the man grabbed her by the shoulders and shoved her against the wall.

"I am my father," he said menacingly.

Hermione saw the pain and agony flash across his eyes, but she did not have the time to process it before her mouth was covered by his. His lips were strong and sure. She didn't mind the taste of brandy on his lips anymore and she opened her mouth slightly to allow the kiss to deepen. Snape grabbed her bottom and lifted her slightly and she wrapped her legs around his waist.

Hermione could feel his erection through his pants, and it startled her. She realized that this was going to be much different than sleeping with Harry. After a couple of minutes of kissing the older man leaned back and looked straight into her face.

"You're heavy," He said bluntly.

She gasped incredulously, but when he gently let her down to the ground, she started giggling. Hermione felt a puff of air on her head and she looked up. The menacing potions professor was trying to hold back a laugh, an expression that she had never seen before.

"Maybe you're just weak," she teased.

"I am not weak!" he said petulantly, like a child.

She raised her eyebrows before she started walking towards a door that must surely be his bedroom.

SSHGSSHGSSHG

Severus Snape was thoroughly confused by this woman. Not two years ago she was his student, and absolutely terrified of him, but she showed no ounce of fear here. He chalked it up to the massive amount of alcohol and the fact that she hadn't eaten dinner.

He felt like a teenager again, making out heavily on his bed fully clothed pawing at each other. He let a wave of nostalgia rush through him as he untucked her skirt and skimmed his hands up her sides. He felt her suck her breath in and she moaned as he cupped his hands around her breasts.

He carefully lifted her shirt off of her and she wiggled out of her skirt. Snape stared at her nakedness with awe. She was unabashed and staring straight back at him. He hadn't been with a willing woman since before the war. His throat dried at the prospect of disappointing her, but as she forcefully pulled him on top of her those thoughts left his head.

Hermione started trying to undo his buttons, but after seconds of trying she got upset. Severus laughed out loud at the look on her face.

"Here, Kitten, let me."

Everything in the room seemed to stop. He didn't mean to let the term of endearment slip out, and it really wasn't the time or the place. He made to move off of the bed. He needed air, his emotions were running too high. He was distracted by a movement on his bed. Hermione had taken off her bra and her pale skin seemed to glow in the candlelight.

He quickly unbuttoned his outer robe and took off his shirt and pants. He was all over her, touching and kissing every inch of skin he could see. His hands often skated around her delicate lower regions, but then he would move up and cup her breasts, playing with her nipples and nipping at the sensitive spot he found on her neck.

"Please, Severus,"

Her voice startled him. It was huskier than normal and when he looked down at her he was proud to see that she was flushed with her arousal. Her shoulders and breasts were a mottled read and her lips were slightly bruised. He lay his hand on her face and let it drift slowly down and stopped when he reached the top of her knickers. He dipped one finger just below the band and she nearly panted.

He slipped his fingers into her and was surprised at her wetness. She started pawing at his clothes, so he removed his fingers and removed the rest of his clothes. Hermione then rolled Severus over and climbed on top of him. Severus couldn't recover from shock as Hermione lined him up with her entrance and sank down on him. All he could do was sit there as she moved on top of him.

Snapping into his sense and wanting to be in control, he flipped her over, pinning her arms above her and claiming her lips forcefully. He pulled away and looked at her. She was beautiful underneath him, though scars marred her skin, it only made her look even more gorgeous and somewhat vulnerable. _Like and angle,_ He thought. Their lovemaking turned into a delectable dance for dominance in a situation neither could control.

After he was spent, he rolled away from her. He knew he should kick her out, tell her to leave at least. But when she touched his back, tracing his scars, he felt as if years of stress were melting away as he fell asleep, her delicate hands wandered the span of his back.

HGSSHGSSHGSSHGSS

Harry wandered into a seedy looking pub. When he opened the door, it looked pitch black inside before his eyes adjusted. He instinctively looked around the bar, casing the area. There were six people, a group of four guys, a girl with a cane and the bartender. None of them appeared to be wizards, and so he went to sit at the bar.

The bartender poured him a drink and gave him a knowing look. Harry looked down at the glass and not caring whether it was poisoned or not, he downed it. The cinnamon-sweet liquid burned as it slid down his throat. He sputtered a bit, not expecting the flavor.

"What is that?" he asked, staring at the double shot glass with incredulity.

"Oh aye, that'll be Fireball. The birds usually drink it, but it's easy to drink, and you my friend, need to get drunk." The bartender said.

Harry motioned to have his glass refilled and the bartender complied. After a few more drinks, he heard a soft tapping emanating from behind him. He turned to see the woman get up and use her cane to guide her towards the door, knocking it against the furniture. Time seemed to stop as he saw one of the guys stick out his foot between the cane and her legs, causing her to fall over into one of the nearby tables.

Harry shot up out of his seat and rushed over to help her. The group of drunk men were loudly jeering at her. The bartender walked up to the group.

"Come on Jamie, I said that you coul' bring your friends, but not if ya going to be a right prick. Out!" He turned to Harry and the woman "Sorry about my son, he don' mean no harm, but you know how children are."

Harry nodded at the man and straightened out the woman's clothes.

"Thanks, I guess," the woman said, not looking at his face.

She seemed to be beautiful to Harry with her dark, straight, black hair and slightly tan skin. It was only then he noticed she was wearing sunglasses inside.

"Oh, you're blind." He blurted out.

"How insensitively true," she answered

"I mean, do you want to get a drink?"

"Nice save, and I think we are in a bar," she answered.

Harry guided her over to the bar and sat her down next to his stool. He settled into his own and the bartender poured him another drink and mixed the woman one.

"You're very pretty," Harry said, blushing.

"You're very drunk," She answered, "and you don't even know my name."

"I am going to name you," Harry thought for a moment, "Penelope!"

'Penelope' giggled and took a sip of her drink.

"So, what are you doing here?" she asked

"The woman I love left me," he answered dejectedly

"That's rough, buddy," she answered, obviously not knowing what to say

"What's worse," he continued, "She never even loved me. I mean she loves me, but she's not in love with me, and she never will be. And you know what, I'll never get over her. She's perfect. Beautiful and smart and absolutely fierce. But she didn't love me. Why couldn't she love me?"

"Well, sometimes it just isn't that way with people," She said

"That doesn't make any sense."

"She doesn't love you, but that doesn't mean no one else ever will."

"No, if she doesn't love me, then no one else can. She knows everything about me, and we've been through so much together."

"I could love you."

"No, you couldn't," he shot back

"How do you know?" she asked

"And what's even worse, he said ignoring her question, is I had her. She was mine, but no. We can't be together because of some stupid law. And she has to sleep with someone, the only person I hate. even though he saved my life, all of our lives..." He trailed off

"What law?" she asked "You guys aren't like, related or anything?"

"What?" he exclaimed, "No, no it's a...er... a religious law, of sorts."

"Ok, good. Just hoping it's not a Flowers in the Attic situation."

"I don't understand you," he said, putting his finger on her nose.

"You're not supposed to," she said

The bartender came over, interrupting their conversation.

"Time for you to go, son."

"You're probably right," Harry said, placing a stack of pounds on the bar and got up to leave

"This is too much," the older man said

"It's for the lady and me and the tip," Harry answered, shaking his head

He turned to leave and the woman, 'Penelope' grabbed at him

"You seem nice, even though you're drunk. Here's my number. Call if you survive this."

Harry took the card from her hands and stuffed it in his pocket and left the bar, a horrible idea coming into his head.

SSHGSSHGSSHG

Hermione was dreaming, or at least she thought she was. There was no other rational explanation for her to be back in the Forest of Dean. She swore she would never go back there. She was terrified, but she didn't know why. She was looking for something, but she didn't know what. She ran and she ran, but she wasn't getting anywhere, then suddenly she was at a cliff. There was a long strip of land and at the end of it was Harry.

He was looking at her with his sad eyes. It was the look he gave her after every time they slept together. Filled with so much love and so much sadness.

"Let me go, Hermione," he said in a quiet voice, though it carried to her ears.

"Harry," she said sadly

"You're killing me."

As he said this, the land bridge began to crumble beneath him.

"Harry!" she screamed

He just gave her a pained look as he fell backwards into the oblivion

"Harry!"

Hermione woke up as she fell to the floor. She did not immediately recognize her surroundings and she didn't remember how she got there, but she could guess by the decor that it was the former Professor's room. She looked up to see a furious face staring her down.

"You will not say his name in my bed."

Hermione was confused, her dream already fading from her mind.

"What name?" she asked

"Get out of my quarters" he yelled at her, motioning towards the door

She fled from the room, not caring that she was half-dressed. Halfway to her rooms she started crying.

Why did it have to be him?

SSHGSSHGSSHG

About an hour later, Harry appeared at the entrance to Snape's quarters and banged on the door. They opened and there appeared the man that Harry hated most in the world right now.

"Mr. Pott—"

"YOU!" Harry interrupted, "I hate you!" he said drunkenly, pushing past him and entering the room uninvited.

"I can say that the feeling is mutual."

"Why did you have to take her away from me?" the young boy asked

"I did no such thing, if anything you should blame the ministry."

"No, this is your fault. Because she is a loyal person. And now she will have nothing to do with me. You don't deserve her."

"I assure you, Potter," he spat, "that I want nothing to do with her."

"Then it's your loss, because she would love you, and Hermione is the type of person you want to be loved by."

"Tell me, did you sleep with her?" the older man asked

"Yes," Harry answered defiantly

Snape looked down his nose at him "Figures I get Potter's sloppy seconds."

Harry, having heard this derogatory remark about the woman that he loved, swung a right hook at him, hitting Snape square in the jaw, causing him to stumble back a couple of feet.

Harry expected a retaliation, a curse, maybe even harsh words, but Snape only clutched at his jaw and stared at Harry. Harry slumped into one of the arm chairs. There was absolute silence for far too long. Finally, Harry let out a sigh and started talking.

"I never knew why you hated me so much until this moment. My dad, he bullied you, then the woman you loved fell in love with him. I never understood, I mean, I tried to understand, but I never knew it would feel like this."

"You know nothing of what it feels like."

"Hermione is the only person I will ever love. You, you bullied me throughout my time here, and then you took her from me. She will have your children and never look at another man besides you. If I wanted to, I could hate her children. I would treat them as cruelly as you treated me because they are a constant reminder that she is not mine any longer, but I won't. I won't because I know what type of man you are. You will be distant, cold, cruel. Hermione will need someone to help her with the baby. I will love her and her child like they were my own."

"I think you should abandon this foolish notion, Potter. You can't be with her anymore"

Snape felt uneasy at the words flowing out of Harry's mouth.

"I am glad it was you," Harry said, "I am glad that she got stuck with you over anyone else, because I know she will never love you. She won't even love you the way she loves me."

Harry laughed to himself as he got up to leave. As he opened the door, he looked behind him.

"Hermione will never love you."

SSHGSSHGSSHG

Hermione was panicking in her room. She didn't know what she had done wrong. Harry wasn't in her rrom and Snape had gotten so mad at her and then kicked her out. She felt alone, trapped in a place she used to love.

She walked over to the fireplace and grabbed a pinch of floo poweder.

"The Burrow!"

Hermione stumbled out of the fireplace and almost into the laps of Ron and Lavender who were cuddling in the living room.

"Blimey, Hermione!" Ron yelped, "You're not supposed to leave Hogwarts."

Ron gently got up off of the couch as to not wake the sleeping girl.

"Doesn't the term start tomorrow?" He asked.

Hermione collapsed into his arms in tears. He awkwardly started rubbing her back and she took comfort in his arms.

"Lav," Ron called over to his girlfriend.

She woke up with a start and saw Hermione crying in Ron's arms.

"I think we need some tea,"

Lavender laughed at Ron awkwardly holding a crying Hermione, terror of the crying woman clearly on his face and she went to put the kettle on.

SSHGSSHG


	6. In Which the Healing Begins

**A/N: There is a lot of Ron/ Lavender in this chapter. I've read many a Fanfic with bashing, but that is not what I intend to do here. I feel like the war would have changed most people for the better, even though they would still have problems, so the first bit of this chapter explores how RW/LB changed during the war and how they are helping each other heal in the after effects. I also tried to explain why they would be teaching at Hogwarts despite being so young, but it's a fanfic, so please don't hate that plot point.**

 **In Which the Healing Begins**

Ronald Weasley was not good with women, and he knew it. Hermione had told him he had an emotional range of a teaspoon, and he knew she was right. When Lavender came in with the tea, he happily traded the crying woman for a hot cup.

He watched Lavender gently guide one of his oldest friends to the couch, rubbing small circles on her back and asking her various questions in a gentle voice. He stared proudly at his girlfriend. She had come a long way. Ron knew Lavender never really got along with Hermione and that she could sometimes be petty and shallow. But after the war, the war changed everything.

Lavender had stepped up in her seventh year in a way that made Ron ashamed in the way he had acted around his friends. His year mates that had stayed behind told stories of how she protected first years against the Carrows, saving them from detention multiple times only to face torture herself and he had witnessed firsthand how ferociously she had fought during the final battle. She mellowed out and learned to think before she spoke, much in the way that he himself had.

Then after Fenrir attacked her, her penchant for shallow, look based opinions all but disappeared. She didn't take any less care of herself, and she was as beautiful as ever, but she was much less apt to judge first and ask questions later. He had completely ripped out her throat and only the quick thinking of Seamus had saved her life. Sometimes she woke up screaming from nightmares, thinking that she would finally turn, but she never did. It was a miracle, no one knew why she had never turned, but the healers speculated it was because she was dead for several seconds before Seamus brought her back to life.

Ron looked sadly at the scarf she always wore. The scars on her neck were quite extensive, they couldn't even be covered up by concealment charms for an extended amount of time. No matter how many times Ron told her how beautiful she was in spite of the scars, she almost never took off her scarf, even while sleeping.

He watched her wrap Hermione, who was no longer crying, in a blanket and push a cup of tea into her hands. Lavender smoothed back Hermione's hair and tucked a bit behind her ear. She then stood up and walked over to him.

"You need to talk to her," Lav whispered to him, "I'll head upstairs to bed."

Ron walked carefully around the couch and sat down in the armchair opposite to Hermione. He didn't know how to begin, so he stayed silent.

"So, you and Lav, huh? What happened to Hannah? I thought you had hit it off." Hermione said, trying to break the silence, her voice still broken from crying.

"Yeah, the law, you know? And Hannah and me, it wouldn't have worked out. Think about how ginger our kids would be!"

Hermione laughed at Ron's joke. He always knew what to say to cheer her up. Her face returned to its serious state.

"How's it going with her? She seems… Nice. And are you sure Hannah took it well?"

"I wasn't sure, at first, cause, before…you know? But then, she like, changed, I guess. And Hannah, well I was broken up about it, ya know? But she's with Neville now. He's good to her and I am happy, I guess."

Hermione laughed at Ron, who was blushing a deep red.

"Ever articulate." Was all she said.

"Lav's great now, that's all that matters, and it's not like we have much of a choice, so we decided that we would make a go of it."

"Where are your parents?" Hermione asked, surprised that her loud entrance didn't wake anyone else.

"Oh, er. When we won the Order of Merlin, we got a cash prize, yeah? So, I bought my parent's a new house over the hill that way," He pointed slightly east, "It was owned by the Malfoy's, so it was kind of weird at first, but it suits them well. They wanted to sell this place after the two attacks our sixth and seventh years, too many bad memories, especially after losing Fred," He paused, "but no one would make an offer where they could buy a house big enough for them and Ginny, yeah? So when bought the house and they gave this one to me."

"Oh Ron, I am so proud of you. That was so selfless of you," She smiled through her watery eyes.

"Well, Lav is moving to Hogwarts tomorrow so I am going to spend a lot of time by myself here. I might spend some time remodeling with the rest of the money. Do something nice for Lav. She deserves it."

"What? Why is she moving to Hogwarts?"

"Oh! I thought for sure McGonagall would have told you, though Lav said that she could sens—tell, tell that McGonagall was stressed, so it might have slipped her mind."

"And why is she moving to Hogwarts?" She pushed after there was a silence spanning several seconds.

"Oh, right. Lav is a Seer."

Hermione looked blankly at Ron, waiting for the joke.

"No, Yeah, she had her first premonition on the way to Hogwarts seventh year, apparently. She foresaw the Carrows torturing people on the train and she named the time and date of the final battle right after the winter holidays. No one believed her, because you know how she was before, but she just got certified and since Trelawny passed, there is no Divination teacher."

"It's so weird that two students who just got out of school, who haven't even completed their masteries, are being teachers."

"Well, for Lav, there's really no better teacher for Divination than a Seer, though she could make money elsewhere. And you heard how He Who Must Not Be Named was slaughtering Seers, Lav is one of the only ones left over the age of seventeen. And for you, it anyone would be better than that boring old ghost, and you're the only one that learned anything from that class anyways."

He paused for a moment, "you also don't need a mastery in History of Magic to Teach it at Hogwarts, only an 'O' in your NEWT."

Hermione was shocked that Ron knew something she didn't.

"You're not moving to Hogwarts with Lavender?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah, Teacher's spouses aren't allowed to stay at the school. Lav will be back every other weekend when she's not on duty."

Ron paused and looked straight into Hermione's eyes.

"Why are you here, Hermione?"

Ron knew that Hermione was avoiding the issue, so he took a direct approach.

"I got matched with Severus Snape."

Ron thought that he might have misheard her, that she was making a joke, but no clarification came.

"SEVERUS SNAPE!" He shouted, standing up.

Ron was fuming, not even noticing that he was shouting things. He could only imagine what that man, that evil man was doing to their poor Hermione. He then felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around and was faced by Lav, who had a stern look in her eyes.

"Temper, Ron." She said.

He immediately calmed down and turned towards Hermione.

"Sorry about that, I've been to St. Mungo's and they said the Horcruxes' residual energy is still messing with my moods. It's something that I—" He looked down at Lavender, "It's something that we're working on."

Hermione just sat there in shock, a strange look on her face.

"So, erm, I can talk to my dad and see what he can do," Ron said awkwardly.

"Oh, well, it's too late for that," Hermione said vaguely.

Ron blanched at the thought and Lavender giggled.

"And, and Harry didn't take it too well." She blurted out.

A serious look came over Ron's face.

"I thought that you broke things off with him."

"I tried, Ron."

"Merlin's Balls Hermione!" He shouted.

He felt Lavender's grip on his arm again. He mumbled an apology. Hermione started crying again.

"I-I've made s-s-such a mess of things, I don't know how-how to make it better, Ron. Harry was so upset, and I went down to Snape's upset and he was already drunk and I started drinking. One thing led to another and I fell asleep after. I had such a bad nightmare about Harry dying again and when I woke up, he kicked me out. He said I couldn't say 'his' name in Snape's bed. I don't know what I did wrong. I felt so alone, and so I came here."

"Hermione, you talk in your sleep." Lavender piped up.

Ron nodded, having had many full-blown conversations with her while she was asleep.

"I remember," Lavender continued, "During the Triwizard Tournament, you were really scared for Harry, I overheard you talking about your nightmares with Parvati. You said Harry's name all the time in your sleep. We thought you had a crush on him until you told Parvati about your nightmares."

Hermione's mouth formed an 'o' and she stood up.

"I should- I should go. I'll see you guys for the feast."

Hermione quickly stood up and prepared the fire to floo. Saying quick goodbyes and thanking Lavender for the tea, she turned to floo away. Ron and Lavender stared at the fire for several seconds, wondering about Hermione's quick departure before Ron shook his head and started leading Lav up the stairs.

He got ready for bed in the hall bathroom and when he came into their room, he saw Lavender staring at her neck in the mirror. It was one of the few times he had actually seen the scars. The ridges of cartilage formed sharp peaks along the mottled pink flesh. His heart felt heavy as she raised her hand, tears in her eyes, to touch her marred flesh. He quietly came up behind her.

When she saw him in the mirror, she let out a loud 'yip' and reached for her scarf to cover up her scars. Ron snatched her hands halfway up and pulled them down to her sides. He brought his head around and kissing a line down the scars.

"I used to be so beautiful," she said in a quiet voice.

"Lav, you are beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as Hermione. She doesn't have any scars."

"Lavender," he said harshly, turning her to face him, "Do not compare yourself to her. You're not Hermione and Hermione could never be you. And Hermione has scars, just like me and Harry."

"Really?"

"She has a cut from here," he pointed to her left shoulder, "to here," he said, pointing to the area just above here naval, "from a slicing hex thrown her way during the final battle. She has cuts all long her back and sides and legs from living in the woods, breaking into Gringotts and getting caught by snatchers. Then Lestrange cut 'mudblood' into her arm. Her scars aren't as visible as yours, but she still has them, we all have them."

"I'm sorry, Ron," she looked to the floor dejectedly, "It's just so hard because everybody knows what it looks like, how _ugly_ it is. It makes me feel so alone, it makes me feel so ugly."

"You are the bravest, most beautiful woman I have ever met. This is a battle you will be fighting for the rest of your life, but I am here for you, and I will love you for the rest of eternity, and I will think you are beautiful even when you turn a hundred and thirty and you are old and wrinkly and grey."

He looked down at the woman and noticed she was crying.

"What did I say?" he asked, baffled at her reaction.

Lavender started laughing, "your friends always say you are not good with words, but you always say everything perfectly to me." She said.

"That's because it's important I get it right with you."

They smiled at each other for a while feeling at peace and not wanting to break the moment.

"You have the most beautiful eyes," he said and kissed both of her eyes.

"You have the cutest nose," He said, kissing the tip of her nose.

"You have the best lips," he said kissing her on the lips.

"And you have the most perfect neck in all of Brittan." He kissed her straight on her scars.

He looked into her smiling face, knowing that he had made things right with her for now. It wasn't going to get better in just one day, or even in ten years, like his temper. But as Ron lay with a sleeping Lavender in his arms, he swore to himself he would do anything in his power to help his Lavender through this. He kissed the top of her head and she snuggled into his side.

"I am going to miss you," He said to no one in particular.

He smiled as Lavender murmured in her unconscious state. He brushed some strands of her beautiful blond hair out of the way before settling in to sleep.

SSHGSSHGSSHGSSHG

Four weeks flew by in a blink of an eye. Between his classes and his personal research, Severus hadn't even thought to seek out the fiery brunette. The dark man rubbed his eyes and looked at the mantle. The clock read one in the morning, which was late even for him. He stood up, tidying the large pile of seventh-year essays and walked over to his decanter to pour himself a stiff drink, he still had a lot of work to do before sleep.

There was a knock on his door. He glared at the formidable piece of wood.

"I swear if it is another first year, they will lose a hundred house points," he said under his breath.

He opened the door and there was Hermione. Severus took in a deep breath. He discretely glanced both ways in the narrow hall. He saw Potter standing about ten feet down the hall, and his presence infuriated him. He had no desire to see the boy ever again. He focused his attention on the woman in front of him. She handed him a stick with a plus sign on it.

"Poppy said it is a boy," was all she said.

Severus stared blankly at her as she walked away. Potter snaked his arm around her waist, and he watched Hermione lean into Potter's side as he led her down the hallway. Before they turned the corner, Potter shot Severus a look that made his blood boil.

Severus shut the door to his room and stumbled into his armchair. He stared at the plus sign.

"I am going to be a father," he said out loud to the empty dungeon air.

Potter's words from that night raced across his mind. He remembered how protective he was of the girl, how Potter would be there, had been there, even when he hadn't been. He clenched his fists in anger. He had to do something, but suddenly his limbs felt heavy and his eyelids started drooping.

"Tomorrow," he said to himself, "tomorrow."

SSHGSSHG

Hermione was fed up with Severus Snape and Harry Potter. Snape, even after she had told him she was pregnant with his child almost two months before, had barely sent a glance her way. Every time she would try to approach him, he would walk straight away from her faster than someone of her short stature could keep up.

And Harry Potter, even at his name she was nearly fuming with anger. He treated her like she was made of porcelain. He had taken to following her everywhere, to the library, the great hall, even to some of her classes under the invisibility cloak. She felt smothered by him, and the only time she could be alone was while she was sleeping or visiting Lavender, who Harry still had not taken a liking to.

So, like she had so often for the past couple months, she was headed up to the Divination tower. The hatch leading up to the classroom was closed so Hermione deduced class was still in session. About five minutes later, it opened, and the strong smell of incense wafted down as the students exited the room.

"That was so cool!" She overheard the students whispering in reverent voices to each other.

Lavender was strangely well respected throughout to school. Hermione knew most of the students in third year remembered how protective of them in their first year against the many dangers the school bore at the time. Students, especially Gryffindors, often came to her defense whenever someone dared to make comments about her, especially her scars.

"A real prophecy, I wonder who it was about?"

"A great danger to one so small? Could it be one of the first years?"

Hermione shook her head, she knew that Seers existed and believed in the prophecies, but did not take much stock in them. It wasn't an exact study like transfiguration or potions, and prophecies could be told hundreds of years in advanced or misinterpreted.

Hermione carefully climbed the ladder. She wasn't huge yet, but the extra weight threw off her center of balance and she caught herself tripping on air more often than she would like to admit.

"Hermione!" Exclaimed the blond woman, waving her wand to clear the room of the incense. They had found out previously that while pregnant, Hermione could not stand the smell of it for more than a few minutes before heaving into a trash can.

Lavender herself admitted that the incense did nothing to help with divining, but most Seers enjoyed the atmosphere it created.

"And how is our little August?" She said, gesturing to her stomach.

Hermione plopped into one of the comfortable chairs. It was the only thing she regretted when she quit divination her third year. The chairs were soft as pillows, unlike all the hard wooden chairs everywhere else in the castle.

"Why do you insist on calling him August? I haven't even picked out a name yet."

"Snape wants to name him August."

"How do you know?" She asked suspiciously.

"It's his grandfather's on his mother's side name. He was the only person to ever show him kindness in his childhood, though he passed when he was about six. His grandfather left him his wand, and he still keeps it on him even though it does not obey him."

"How do you know that?" Hermione asked, voice full of wonder.

"I bumped into him the other day, and when we made contact, I had a vision of his childhood. It wasn't a pretty time for him, Hermione."

Hermione looked down at her hands, suddenly very guilty at being upset with the older man. She subconsciously rubbed her slightly protruding belly. Lavender looked at her, scrutinizing her expression.

"Hard day at work? The Fourth goblin revolution didn't go over well with the students?" She teased.

"No, it was fine," Hermione answered in an exasperated tone.

"Though I wish that they would try harder in their essays. I assigned thirteen inches on the formation of the Ministry of Magic and one boy turned in one sentence: This doesn't matter. He does well on the tests, he clearly pays attention and reads the book, but he almost never turns in his homework."

"Oh, I know, though most people who take Divination don't take it seriously."

"That's not true!"

Lavender laughed, "Hermione you couldn't even finish the first year of Divination, you don't have to lie to me. Some of the things these kids make up are crazy. I was teaching them to read tea leaves, and I swear we have a small Trelawney on our hands. She was convinced she was going to die."

Hermione giggled at the prospect of a terrified third year.

"So, what's up, if it's not classes, then what's going on."

"It's Harry," she thought for a moment, "And Snape. Both of them are driving me crazy."

"What's going on with Harry?" She asked curiously.

"He won't leave me alone. He watches everything I do. He even comes to most of my classes. I hate it, I can't get a moment alone unless I come talk to you."

Lavender shot her a hurt look

"Oh, no, Lav," she said, using her nickname, "I love spending time with you. You're my first real girlfriend. I wish I didn't have to come up here whenever I didn't want to be around Harry. Sometimes I just want to read for hours at a time without a bored, fidgety Harry in the room."

Lavender smiled at her, accepting her apology.

"And Harry keeps trying to sleep with me!" Hermione blurted out.

She blushed at her outburst, and remained silent for several seconds, wishing she had never brought it up.

"Ron told me some of what had happened. About when he left…" She trailed off.

"I was lonely, and Harry, he's insistent, and one night we were dancing and one thing led to another. Then after this law happened, Harry got a letter saying that he could never have magical children. It was hard on him, and I wanted to comfort him. I have a weak spot for him, and I just wanted him to be happy. He knows I don't love him in that way. I told him so to his face."

"I understand, Hermione," was all that Lavender said.

"But now I am pregnant with Snape's kid, and he still wants to sleep with me. It's weird and it feels like I am betraying Snape even entertaining the idea."

Hermione stood up and started pacing the room, she was absolutely furious.

"What happened with Snape?" The blond asked curiously.

"Nothing has happened with Snape! That's the problem. I told him I was pregnant with HIS child almost two and a half months ago. I am four months pregnant and he hasn't talked to me. I can't do this by myself. I know that Harry will take care of us, but I don't want to deprive this child of their real father, no matter how unpleasant they are."

"Go to Snape during his office hours, or when you think he will be in his rooms. Snape is a private man, and people still don't know who knocked you up, so he probably wants to be seen with you as little as possible. Plus, then he can't run away from you."

The news of her pregnancy had flown around the school like a wild fire. The students knew that she was affected by the law and they all wanted to know who her 'magic match' was and why she hadn't married him.

"You're so smart Lav."

Lavender looked up at her with mischief in her eyes, "I wasn't third best in our year for nothing."

"Third?" Hermione asked, "I thought it was that rude prefect from Hufflepuff, the one that almost sold the DA out to the Carrows before he went 'missing'"

"MacMillan? No, he always boasted he was third because everyone knew no one could beat you or Malfoy. He got pretty good grades but little ol' me was still in third. He got two E's on his NEWTS and I got all O's except for history of magic."

Hermione hugged the other woman "You never cease to amaze me Lav. I wish we had become friends sooner."

"I'm glad we didn't. I wasn't a good person before."

"You were a good person, this version of you is just more grown up. You were just a kid. We were all just kids."

Hermione stood up to leave, "I should talk to Snape before dinner. His office hours start in fifteen minutes. I don't think people go to them anyways."

Hermione went to leave, but a troubling look on Lavender's face stopped her. Hermione looked into her blue-purple eyes, trying to penetrate her thoughts.

"I'm pregnant," Lavender whispered.

"Oh, Lav, That's excellent, and just in time too, right? You only had two months left."

"I haven't told Ron yet, I only just went to visit Poppy."

"You have to tell him." Hermione stated.

"Do you think he'll be upset?" Lavender asked, fidgeting with her ever-present scarf.

"I think he will be extatic. Ron has always wanted a big family, and you make him happy."

Lavender smiled at her, and Hermione was grateful she could reassure the other woman, given her own situation.

"Good luck with the snarky potions professor," Lavender told her playfully as Hermione started to climb down the ladder, "And we have to meet in your room from now on. You cannot climb this ladder, you might fall, and we don't want little August to get hurt." Lavender gave her a worried look that startled Hermione.

"Thanks, and say hello to Ron for me," she called up.

Hermione made her way down to the dungeons. It was such a long way from the Divination tower and by the time she got to his office, she was absolutely exhausted. Hermione knocked on the door briefly and didn't even wait for a response before walking in. To her surprise there was an older looking male Slytherin student talking to him animatedly.

They both froze and looked at her. Thinking on her feet, she said "I need to speak with you about some detentions you assigned to me."

Snape always assigned first year detentions and detentions for people who committed minor offences with her. It was clear that Snape still had a heart under all the snarkiness and sarcasm because at worst she made them do lines.

The seventh year stood up and gathered his materials.

"Darrow, I'll approve your research project if you write me twenty inches on why you should not add wormwood to your potion due Friday."

It was Thursday, but instead of argue or complain, the student left with a reverent 'yes, Professor Snape Sir.'

"He was very polite," Hermione commented.

"Most Slytherins give teachers their due respect to their face and those who don't learn they should really quickly."

Hermione nodded, having learned this first hand. The Slytherins were the least ornery of the houses during class but weren't quiet when they made disparaging remarks during her study time in the library, though no one ever said anything to her face.

"What do you need Ms. Granger?"

"You're not talking to me," Hermione said.

"Do I need to talk to you?" He asked.

Hermione stared at him blankly, not comprehending the question.

"I was under the impression that I didn't need to talk to you for the next two years until we have to copulate again."

Hermione was dumbfounded.

"How dare you?" Hermione walked straight up to his desk, leaned over and poked him straight in his chest.

"Don't you dare touch me, Ms. Granger." He whispered.

"You are going to leave me to do everything myself. I have half a mind to hex you six ways until Sunday."

"What does it matter, you have Potter," Snape spat his name.

"Harry isn't the father of this child. You are, you need to step up and take responsibility."

Snape gripped the edges of the table, his knuckles looked like they were bleached white even in the green light of the dungeons.

"I will not let another Potter take what's mine." Snape said in a deadly voice.

Hermione, thinking that he was talking about her, was indignant.

"I belong to no one, and I am not an object you can just take and give away!"

Snape moved quickly around the desk and rest his hand on her expanded stomach.

"You may not be, but this one is mine. This is my child, my boy. I will not, I cannot claim him if Potter is just going to steal him away from me."

"Why do you think that Harry is going to steal him away from you?"

Hermione felt his cool hand grab her warm one. He gently led her to a cabinet where a pensieve sat. He pulled the memory out and put it into the basin. Hermione was slightly scared of the angry professor, but she stuck her face into the pensieve anyways, curious at what had transpired.

SSHGSSHG

 _Hermione was in the courtyard outside of the charms classroom. There was a group of students jeering at a shabbily dressed, younger version of the domineering professor. James Potter, who looked so like her sweet Harry, was staring mockingly at the boy. This was the memory that Harry saw, Hermione realized._

" _I don't need help from a Mudblood," Snape spat at the redhead that had rushed over to help him up after berating James. She recognized Lily Evans from Harry's picture album._

 _Hermione flinched when she heard the words come out of his mouth, as did the read headed girl across from him. Hermione quickly turned and looked into the younger potion professor's eyes. She saw the immediate regret that welled up there._

" _Wait, Lily." He said, but she was already gone._

 _Everything faded into fog before taking shape again. Snape was standing outside of the Gryffindor common room. Harry's mom walked out but acted like she couldn't see him._

" _Lily I didn't mean it. I was just embarrassed," He started, "Potter humiliated me in front of anyone. I am sorry, Lily."_

 _Snape looked desperately at the redhead, regret so clearly evident on his face. Lily ignored him and kept walking, picking up her pace. Hermione had to jog slightly to keep up, as she was a couple inches shorter than Lily. Snape grabbed her arm and pulled her into a nearby alcove._

" _What the HELL Severus Snape!" She screamed._

" _Lily be quiet," He begged, his eyes wide, innocent._

" _What do you have to say for yourself?" She asked in an accusatory tone._

" _Lily I…" He paused and took a deep breath, running his long fingers through his hair, "I love you, Lily. I have since the day I met you."_

 _Lily was clearly shocked at his admission._

" _Bull shit," she said, articulating the two syllables._

" _It's true," he said, clearly hurt by her words._

 _Lily left the alcove and continued walking towards the great hall._

" _If you loved me, you wouldn't have called me that," She said sadly._

 _Lily took a deep breath and strengthened her resolve._

" _I have put up with your disgusting friends and your penchant for the dark arts, but you really should not have called me a-a Mudblood."_

 _Hermione stared in disbelief at how Lily was treating Snape. Never in a hundred years would she herself not give someone a second chance, especially when he had seemed so remorseful. She had given Malfoy a second chance, for goodness sakes._

 _They arrived at the great hall and Hermione watched as Snape watched Lily walk over to James Potter and give him a hug. She then whispered something in his ear. Then they kissed._

 _Snape's face contorted as he ran from the great hall._

 _Everything faded to fog again. When it rematerialized, an older version of Snape was kneeling in Dumbledore's office._

" _I'm sorry Headmaster."_

" _You have all but killed her, killed them, Severus."_

" _I didn't mean to, you have to believe me. I was hurt and angry, but I don't want her to die. Please, she can't die, I love her."_

" _If I am going to save her, you will have to pledge your loyalty to me with a blood vow. You will have to act as my spy and be under my command for the duration of your life."_

" _Anything, as long as she lives."_

 _Dumbledore nodded and they shook hands._

 _Hermione didn't know what to think as the memories faded and a new one formed. Harry was drunk in Snape quarters, saying awful things to him. Hermione's eyes widened as Harry told Snape that he was going to raise Snape's kids._

 _Harry's words of 'she will never love you' rang in her ears as she was pulled out of the basin._

SSHGSSHG

Hermione looked at the older man. She had never seen such raw emotion and vulnerability on the hardened man's face. She realized the amount of trust he had just placed in her, showing her what she assumed was one of his most painful memories. Hermione noted the closeness of their bodies. Staring into his bottomless eyes, she tiptoed up and kissed him square on the mouth.

She felt him deepen the kiss before she pulled away slightly. He rested his head on hers, their noses touching. Being in someone's embrace has never felt so right.

"Severus," she said, his first name was weird in her mouth, "You are going to be the father of this child."

"You love Potter though, and he loves you. Someone as young as you deserves to be young and in love."

Hermione had never heard him be so open. In this moment, he reminded her of the boy she saw in the memories, vulnerable and unaware of how to convey his emotions.

"I don't love Harry. I never have, and I never could."

Severus was obviously shocked.

"But you two, you two had sex, he took your virginity."

"It was the middle of a war, Severus. We were scared, Ron had left us. We were both sure we were going to die, either of starvation or being caught by snatchers."

When there was no response from Severus, Hermione continued.

"Harry will always hold a special place in my heart. He saved my life a bunch of times, and I will always love him like a friend. But I could never be in love with him. I told him that from day one. The war did something to him, I think. It made him cling to me, and I never could say no to him."

Severus gave her a hard look.

"But I haven't slept with him, not since that night, I swear."

He looked reassured and touched his hand to her stomach again, rubbing the length of her baby bump. He looked into her eyes, and she noticed his usually emotionless eyes were full of something she couldn't comprehend.

"We're going to have a baby," he said, smiling.

The look was so foreign on his face, but Hermione quickly smiled back.

SSHGSSHG

Hermione sat next to Severus during breakfast. He was still tense and his same old self, shooting evil looks at disobedient students and handing out detentions and mean comments left and right. However, over the last week, Hermione had spent a great deal of time with the potions professor after lights out. They usually spent time in amiable silence, grading papers and writing tests.

She had gone off on Harry after she came back from viewing Severus's memories. After she was done yelling at him, Harry had whispered an apology at the ground and left. She hadn't seen him since and she felt terribly guilty. Things hadn't been easy for him the last few months.

A graceful owl landed in front of her, snapping her out of her thoughts. She gently removed the letter and immediately recognized the Malfoy crest. She fed the owl some bacon and it elegantly took off, returning to his master. She sensed Snape stand up, push his chair in and leave to get ready for his first class of the day. Hermione opened the letter.

 _Granger—_

 _Something may be afoot at Hogwarts. There have been mutterings in less than acceptable places. The light side may have won the war, but it seems the beliefs have hardly been snuffed. They are recruiting at Hogwarts, I don't know what for, but we should meet soon. Next Saturday night in front of the castle gates? 11pm._

 _DM_

Hermione read and reread the letter several times. This was bad, she knew. She needed to tell Severus and the Headmistress right away. She stood up, rubbing her belly lightly, and exited the great hall using the teacher's door.

She started heading down to the dungeons. The woman felt a tingling on the back of her neck and looked around her, but the hall was empty. Hermione turned the corner and started to walk down the final staircase leading to the potions classroom where she was sure Severus was waiting. As she took her first step down the stairs, she felt pressure on both of her shoulder blades as she was shoved down the stairs. She would usually be able to catch herself, but her center of balance was off and with her magic gone, there was no way for her to cushion her fall.

She screamed as her foot missed the next step and she twisted, rolling down the stairs three times before hitting the landing with a hard thud. She looked back at the top of the stairs, searching for her pusher. Her eyes shifted left and right around something and she realized whoever pushed her had a strong notice-me-not charm on them. The only thing she could see of her attacker was the deep red of the Gryffindor uniforms. She tried to get up, but her legs weren't working.

As the adrenalin wore off, she felt an odd feeling in the lower back akin to cramps. She felt her stomach and looked down between her legs. Her pale pink robes were becoming stained by blood spreading towards her useless limbs.

"HELP!" She screamed, "HELP!"

She heard a rushing of footsteps as a seventh year Slytherin, probably on his way to Severus's class, ran up the stairs. Hermione recognized him from his class and the Quidditch team. He was one of the beaters, she thought, the boy that was doing a project for Severus. Darrow was his name, she remembered.

"Professor, you're bleeding!" He exclaimed, looking at her in horror.

"I need you to get Madame Pomphrey. Someone pushed me down the stairs."

Hermione grimaced in pain as her lower muscles tightened. She didn't notice the Slytherin cast an impervious charm on his clothes or the featherweight charm on her. He reached down and picked her up. She was already feeling faint as he started running, yelling at anyone who was in the way. They reached the infirmary in record time.

"Madame Pomphrey! Help!" He called.

She came running out of her office.

"Mr. Darrow you better have not—Hermione!" she exclaimed.

The last thing she saw was the worried healers face as she screamed in pain and slipped into unconsciousness.


	7. In Which there is a Grave

**A/N: I know it's a shorter chapter but I can't leave you on a cliffhanger for long. I love each and every one of my reviews. Thank you all for reading!**

Darrow burst through the doors leading to the potion's classroom. Despite his impervious charm, his clothes were still drenched in blood and his face was pale. Severus raised his head up at the loud noise.

"Darrow! You better have a damn good reason for being late. I have half a mind to revoke your project!"

Severus stared at the silent boy and his eyes travelled down to his clothes, widening when he saw the dark red liquid staining the green on his uniform.

"Mr. Darrow, is that blood?" Severus asked in a low voice.

The young boy seemed to find his voice. "It's Professor Granger, sir. Someone pushed her down the stairs. There's something wrong with the baby. Madame Pomphrey requested your presence."

Severus's heart seemed to stop and his breathing hitched slightly as he realized the implication. He looked in shock at Darrow, trying to keep a calm demeanor. He knew he needed to go to the hospital wing as soon as possible.

"Darrow, grab blood replenishing potions from storage and follow me."

Darrow rushed to the stores while Severus regained his composure and dismissed his class, but not before giving a ridiculously long homework assignment to make up for the short class. When Darrow returned, they left together.

About halfway there, Darrow turned the professor and asked him a question that he was not in a right mind to answer. "Is it yours?"

Snape nodded without thinking and picked up his pace.

"I won't tell, professor."  
He muttered a thanks before turning into the hospital wing and was greeted by an unpleasant sight. Hermione was laying on the bed, her eyes closed and her breath rising and falling in shallow breaths. Potter and Weasley were standing above her, talking none too quietly.

"I should have been there," Potter said dejectedly.

"Harry, mate, it wasn't your fault."

"It is. I should have been there. I could have cushioned her fall, or caught her, or something. She almost died, Ron. I don't know what I would do without her."

"Don't talk like that. She's my friend too."

"I love her, Ron. I love her so much and I just want her to be alright."

"Harry," Ron sighed, "You need to let her go."

"I can't!" Harry shouted.

"Mate, I know Hermione has always been here for you. Except that time in third year."

"She was right on that one too," Harry picked up one of her delicate hands.

Severus felt something akin to jealousy bubble up in his chest, but he remained still.

"I know you feel like everyone you loved has abandoned you. Your parents, Sirius, even me."

"No, Ron—"

"Save it, Harry. I know you probably won't ever forgive me. Things will never be the same, and that's ok. But Hermione, she has stuck with you no matter what. She's saved our lives countless times. But you can't be with her. She belongs with Snape now, no matter how much I dislike the bloke. He isn't all bad, Lav tells me. It's time to let her go. She would stay with you if you asked, but she wouldn't be happy. That's how loyal she is. If you love her and care about her happiness, you need to let her go."

Harry dropped Hermione's hand. "When did you get so sensible?"

Ron just shrugged. Darrow left Severus's side and walked over to the two other boys. Weasley clapped the boy on the shoulder.

"Thanks for helping our girl," Ron said.

"We owe you one, if you need something all you have to do is ask."

Severus was distracted by Poppy coming out of her office. Tears were streaking down her face. The dark man was stricken by her expression.

"Oh, Severus. I am so sorry. I did everything I could, but there was so much blood. Hermione barely survived, but the baby," she paused and took a deep breath, "The baby didn't make it."

Severus didn't know how to respond. He looked over to the pale girl lying on the bed. The two boys turned at Poppy's voice and saw Severus standing by the doors. Both of their faces were filled with sorrow and pain that mirrored his own. Potter started for him, but Severus had already turned around, heading back down to the dungeons.

Severus slammed the doors to his quarters. In the living room in front of the fire place there was a cradle, his cradle. He had taken it out of storage and re-polished it. He had planned on giving it to Hermione later in the week as a peace offering. Everything had been going so well.

He saw red and picked up the crib and threw it against the wall. The wood splintered and cracked. It lay on the floor, broken. Severus just stared at it while emotions he didn't know how to deal with rushed through his head. There was a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. Potter had been talking about how he should have been there, but Severus knew otherwise. Severus knew that he himself should have been there, should have escorted her to her classes and to the great hall. He should have made up an excuse to be around her more often, to protect her. He angrily started to feed the splintered wood into the fire. When he was done, he sat, staring into the flames trying to process his complex emotions.

SSHGSSHG

Hermione didn't want to open her eyes. She knew as soon as she opened her eyes, everything would be real. She already knew she lost the baby. Everything felt different. Everything felt wrong. Her two boys had fallen asleep in chairs next to her bed. She could pick their snores out of a crowd after their camping trip. Lavender had come in hours earlier bringing blankets for the two of them. She knew it was morning, but she didn't know how long she had been out. She didn't want to open her eyes.

Hermione heard the doors open and her eyes fluttered open of their own accord. She turned her head to see who had come in. It was Darrow, the boy who had helped her to the hospital wing. He was holding a flower and walked over to her bed. She tried to smile at him and he smiled back in relief, quietly skirting around the two boys.

"You're ok," He whispered.

She nodded, but then her eyes teared up, remembering the child.

"I am so sorry," he said, "If I was faster."

"No, Darrow. You did everything you could. If you had followed my instruction instead of carrying me, I surely would have died. I owe you my life."

He smiled at her.

"Why are you so friendly to me?" she asked.

"I'm a muggleborn."

"Muggleborns never get sorted into Slytherin."

"They do, but they never say anything. Whenever anyone asks, we say our mother or father was a squib. Son of a squib is better than being a muggleborn in Slytherin. Snape briefs us on what to say our first day."

He looked at her awkwardly.

"How is he?" She asked, "He hasn't been to see me, has he?"

"He did, when he first knew. He cancelled class for the rest of the week, and no one has seen him since. He was really worried about you and when Pomphrey told him about the baby, he lost it, professor."

Hermione grimaced, imagining his reaction. She gingerly got out of bed, stealing all of her strength.

"Professor, you should rest," Darrow was looking at her worriedly.

"I should go see the professor," she winced, "Mr. Darrow, if you please."

Darrow looked uncomfortable before putting her arm over his shoulder and taking most of her weight on his body. They painstakingly made their way down the hallway, grateful it was early on a Saturday and students were all but nonexistent. It seemed to take them forever to reach the dungeons, but at last they were outside of Severus's quarters. She nodded to Darrow who quickly took his leave as to not face the cruel potions professor's wrath. Hermione gently knocked on the door. It swung open to reveal a scowling professor. When he saw her, his eyebrows shot up to his hairline as he ushered her inside.

"Hermione, you're supposed to be resting!" He said.

Hermione couldn't hold the tears in any longer and she threw herself into his arms.

"I-I didn't w-want it to be true," she whimpered.

She felt Severus stiffen, but she didn't care. She kept weeping into the front of her shirt. It felt like the tears were never going to stop.

"I can't go on, Severus. First my parents, then my magic, now this." She trailed off.

"I don't belong here, I can't take it anymore," She continued, "I would be better off without these memories, I should have my wand snapped, it's not much of a use anymore."

"Ms. Granger!" Severus growled, "How dare you say such things!"

Hermione stepped back and looked at the older man, shocked.

"You must be the most imbecilic student I have ever taught. Do you really think you would be happy in the muggle world, wandering around, not feeling quite right? And who would that nitwit Weasley go to when Ms. Brown got upset at him. And Potter…" He paused, clearly not knowing what to say, "And no one else would carry your parent's memory. I would rather commit you to St. Mungo's before the wizarding world lost a mind like yours."

Hermione looked up at the potion's professor in awe. Never before had Severus complimented her, or anyone, in such a way. He seemed acutely aware of that fact and refused to make eye contact. She opened her mouth to speak.

"No more, Ms. Granger," He growled, "We both lost something that day, and he will remain ever with us. You are going back to the infirmary until you come to your senses, then we will find who pushed you, and then we will work non stop to get your magic back."

Hermione, who was feeling rather berated, nodded silently and got up to go back to the hospital wing. Only a couple of steps away, she stumbled a bit, still light headed from the trauma and bloodloss.

"Goodness, girl, how did you get down here?"

"Darrow."

"I am going to kill that boy," he muttered, "Helping you with your ridiculous schemes."

He scooped her into his arms. Hermione resisted the urge to let out a sigh as she melted into her former professor's chest.

"I was going to name him August," she said, staring at his regal face.

An unreadable emotion flashed across his eyes. she felt the slow rise and fall of his chest and his heartbeat sped up.

"That would have been a fine name."

SSHGSSHG

Two days later she was just outside the Hogwarts grounds where her fallen friends were buried. A small portion a ways away from the black lake was reserved for burials after the final battle. It was determined that if the parents consented, the students should be buried near the place they loved and protected with their lives. There were too many headstones, and now she had added one more.

Harry was at her side. He hadn't left since Severus brought her back to the infirmary. She hadn't seen the surly man since. Now, Harry's presence didn't seem so stifling anymore. She was just glad to never be alone with her thoughts.

Ron and lavender were standing behind Harry dressed in black. Lavender had only spoken to Hermione once, to tell her she was having twins, but the blond intuitively knew to stay back. She couldn't be around her so close to losing her own child. She looked over the headstone.

 _August Snape_

 _Loved Forever and Always_

There were no dates. He hadn't even taken a breath, Poppy had told her. She couldn't decide whether or not it was a good thing. She felt Ron come up beside her. Harry and Ron hugged her from both sides, and she relished in the warmth of their bodies. Ron let go and grabbed Harry by the shoulder, leading him up to the castle while Lavender followed him.  
Tears cascaded heavily down her face as she remembered the tiny coffin her unborn child was put in. She felt a presence beside her. She was surprised to find Severus dressed in his usual garb, a somber look on his face. He looked awkward as he tried to place a comforting hand on her shoulder. Hermione leaned into Severus's side, trying to find any amount of comfort.  
"In the muggle world, it would have taken me longer to heal," she whispered to the professor.  
He was visibly confused, "Is that a good thing?" He asked.  
"I would have had to recover longer, to still experience the pain. But it has only been five days and I am fine. I feel fine, but I also feel so empty."  
There was silence as they contemplated what could have been. Hermione continued silently crying and she shakily pulled out a letter from her inner robes. He gently grabbed the letter and she watched as he read the despicable note. She had read it a hundred times and she could picture the cruel cursive.

 _Dear Ms. Hermione Granger,_

 _The Ministry of Magic would like to express their deepest sympathies at your loss. The Magical Community Revitalization Act allows a four-month mourning period for traumatic accidents. After this period, you will have six months to conceive a child._

"How could they?" Severus asked.

"I don't know. I don't know if I could do it again."

Severus stiffened and pulled away, "You seemed to enjoy yourself last time," he bit out.

"You know that's not what I meant."

She was too tired, too emotionally drained to deal with his obvious temper. Hermione felt him wrap his arm around her again. They sat there in silence for fifteen minutes, finding comfort in each other's arms.

"He would have been the smartest student in his year," Severus said.

"I think so too," Hermione whispered, "and he had your hair."

Hermione felt something wet fall on her forehead. She looked up at Severus. There was a single damp trail leading down his face, but his eyes showed no trace of any tears. Hermione walked towards the grave and placed the flowers on the headstone before returning to the professor's embrace. He gently dropped a kiss to the top of her head before grasping her hand and leading her back to the castle.


	8. In Which Hermione Falls

**A/N: Hello Readers! As always, your nice reviews keep me writing. You all are an inspiration. The first part of this story sets up a very important character. It's Finals Week at my Uni and so I may post sporadically. Wish me luck!**

 **WARNING: Sexual Situations and Attempted Suicide. This Story is Rated M! just a reminder.**

Molly Burbage stared, horrified at the potion's professor. All she did was put too many lotus petals into her potion. Just a little too much. The color was still pearly, maybe a bit murkier than it was supposed to be. She stared at the retreating back of the man as he went to so torture some other poor person.

Molly didn't know why he was more awful than usual. Then again, the whole school was off kilter since Professor Granger lost her baby. Molly teared up at the thought and she tried to shake the feeling. But that was the reason that she was sorted into Hufflepuff. She was too empathetic. Whatever someone else was feeling, she would feel it too. Headmistress McGonagall had told the whole school that a student pushed Professor Granger down the stairs.

 _How could someone do something like that?_ She thought, almost starting to cry.

She bottled her potion after stirring it twice, trying to lighten the color. All of the professors aside from Professor Granger had been more snappish, and no more so than Professor Snape. One of her seventh-year house mates said that the school had lost more points in one week than during most years.

She approached the teacher's desk cautiously and picked up a label. Molly quickly wrote her name and house before gently settling the vile in the stand on Professor Snape's desk. Professor Snape, who had been consumed in grading papers, looked up straight into her eyes. Gone was the angry expression he wore earlier. All she saw was sadness. Sadness and pain.

Molly's eyes widened as she came to a conclusion. Professor Snape was Professor Granger's magic match. Molly quickly stole away to sit down in her seat, trying to forget the fact. Her mother's advice, no, orders, floated into her mind as she waited for class to finish up.

" _Molly dear," Her mother called to her._

 _An eleven-year-old Molly was sitting near the pond by their house surrounded by mice, cats, racoons, fox, and even some of the fish came to the edge of the pond as the little girl told them a story. She was purposely ignoring her mother, wanting to finish before she had to go away until summer time._

" _So you better all be here when I get back," She told the various animals as they scattered as her tall tale came to an end._

" _Molly Masie Burbage!" she heard her mom yell._

 _At the sternness of her mother's voice, she dashed to the house. She felt the annoyance come from her mother. The force of it made her tear up._

" _I'm sorry mummy, I wanted to f-finish my s-s-story," She said, trying to hold in her tears._

 _Molly then felt her mom's frustration melt away into a much stronger and softer emotion. Relief washed over the little girl as she grabbed her mom by the waste._

" _Oh, my sweet baby, I could never be upset at you for long."_

 _When her mother didn't speak for some time, Molly looked up at her face. She was getting older, and the little girl noted the fresh wrinkles that appeared in her mother's beautiful skin. She thought it made her mom look wise, regal, especially when her honey-blonde hair was done up in a high twist like it was done today. Her mother's crystal-clear blue eyes were pensive, as if she was thinking of places far away or long ago._

 _Molly remembered a conversation she overheard after she was supposed to be in bed. Her mother was talking to one of her friends about how stressful it was raising a child without a dad. It made her feel guilty, and the same emotions she felt coming from her mother were the same she felt now. It was like when her mom broke her leg. She was feeling pain, but deeper than pain, something more._

" _I'm sorry mummy," she started in her sweetest voice, "I am going to Hogwarts. I won't be here so you won't be so sad and stressed anymore."_

 _The girl, who looked almost exactly like her mother, hugged her even harder and started to cry despite herself._

" _Molly, baby, no," her mother said sternly, "I am sad that you are leaving. I will miss you dearly and I will be counting the seconds until the winter holidays. But about you going to Hogwarts."_

 _Her mother trailed off, seeming to struggle with her words._

" _I should have told you this a long time ago, maybe tried to teach you how to control it, but it is so hard," she sighed, "You are an incredibly bright child. More than that, you are an empath, and those traits mean that you know things. You know things that you are not supposed to know. You are going to be around a lot of people and you are going know things, secrets, that you can never tell without permission. Do you understand me?"_

" _Mummy, you said I should never keep secrets."_

 _The older woman sighed and stood up, "And no more listening to mummy's conversations," she said, but she smiled at the girl._

 _Molly, feeling she was dismissed, went to go upstairs. Before she got too far away, her mother grabbed her arm firmly._

" _Promise me you'll try to keep the secrets, Molly."_

 _Molly stayed silent, not wanting to make a promise to her mom and then break it._

" _Promise me!" Her mom shook her slightly._

" _I promise mummy." She said._

"Miss Burbage!"

Molly was snapped out of her reverie by the unpleasant voice of her potion's professor.

"If you don't vacate your seat this instance, I will assign you another weeks' worth of detention, but this time with Professor Hagrid, He'll have you go into the forbidden forest!"

Molly jumped out of her seat, terrified of the monsters lurking in the dark woods and rushed out of the room. Her friends were standing outside of the class room. They made their way to the Hufflepuff common room.

"Who do you think Professor Granger's magic match is?" One of her friends asked.

This conversation was one almost everybody had about the sweet yet stern professor. Molly had never joined in with these speculations but now she _knew_ something.

"It's Snape!" She couldn't stop herself from blurting out.

Her friends all looked at her with widened eyes before bursting out into laughter. They called her mental, saying they couldn't picture the vicious, sarcastic man with their favorite professor, or anyone for that matter. Molly was silently relieved. She berated herself for sharing yet another secret.

 _I failed you again mummy._

SSHGSSHG

Severus sighed as he glanced at the empty chair next to him. It was the third time this week the woman had not come to any faculty meals. She had missed breakfast in the morning, and She had only just got back to teaching her classes two weeks after the incident and though he tried to seek her out, to ask about her welfare, she was nowhere to be found outside of her classes. He had started to care about her in spite of himself. He grew irritated at the thought and pushed his chair back with a loud creek. He felt all the eyes in the great hall on him as he left the room. On his way to the library he ran into the one person he did not want to see.

"Have you seen Hermione?" The impudent raven-haired boy asked.

"Who do you think I am looking for, boy?" He spat at him, speeding up his steps in a vain effort to lose him.

The boy followed him silently, much to his chagrin. They arrived at the library in silence. Severus passed by her favorite table, even looked in the restricted section, but she was no where to be found. He turned around and Potter was looking both ways, biting his lip.

"There's one more place," he said, walking to a corner of the library.

Severus followed him curiously to a part of the library he had never been to before. The books were all dusty, save a few. He read the titles that were less dirty than the others. _Charlotte's Web_ , _Sense and Sensibility_ , _The Federalist Papers_. He picked up one by Henry David Thoreau. They way he wrote was annoyingly old fashioned, but the pictures he painted with his words were amazing.

"This way," Potter whispered as he pulled a book of the shelf.

Severus was shocked as a section of the bookshelf simply vanished. Potter carried the book inside and Severus followed. He quickly placed the book in an empty gap inside the room and the wall appeared behind him.

"What is this place?" Severus asked.

He looked around him. It wasn't a big place, but there were several more rows of bookshelves, some comfy looking couches and a large roaring fireplace.

"This is… Hermione's place," Harry answered tentatively.

"She made this place?" He asked.

"Well, er, no. The ghost of Ravenclaw showed it to her first year because everyone was teasing her, calling her annoying, a know-it-all. She had wished she had been sorted into Ravenclaw. The ghost took pity on her. Apparently, Rowena made this place for her own daughter to relax after studying. Time works differently in here, it is a bit slower, and the room is spelled to help you relax, but don't worry, Hermione never used this room to extend study time, though maybe she did her third year…" Potter trailed off in silence.

They quickly searched the room, but not finding her there, they replaced the book on the outside of the room and left the library.

"How has no one found that room?" He asked.

"It's the muggle section, and you know how the wizarding world feel about muggles and almost all muggleborns abandon their heritage to be here and feel as though they can't read anything by a muggle. Everyone but Hermione. Now where could she be?"

Severus remembered when they had first found out about the law, the girl had not gone to the Library, but to the tower. Severus turned on his heel and left, not bothering to speak to the annoying boy, who quickly started following him anyways. About halfway there, Potter realized where they were going.

"She wouldn't come up here, she's terrified of heights,"

Severus just grunted as they started climbing the stairs to the astronomy tower. When they reached the top, they saw Hermione, sitting on the window ledge, her legs swung over the side. She was in her white nightgown and her hair was loose, her curls flying every which way. Severus was stricken by her beauty. Her nightgown was almost translucent, and he could see her pale, scarred skin through her dress.

Harry walked up to her and grasped her shoulder.

"Hermione, what's going on?" He asked.

Hermione turned her eyes towards him.

"I'm sorry," she said in a quiet voice.

Her eyes briefly turned and stared straight into Severus's. What he saw there was terrifying. There was nothing. Her eyes perfectly mirrored his own, but it wasn't a mask, like his was. Her eyes were dead, soulless and he was immediately transported back.

 _He was standing by the window in the astronomy tower overlooking the lake. He looked down. It was a long way down. He felt a presence behind him. There was the headmaster, a knowing twinkle in his eye._

" _Killing yourself will solve nothing," The wise man said._

" _I have no reason left to live," he said, his voice emotionless._

" _It wasn't your fault. You didn't kill them."_

" _But you said—" Severus started._

" _I was angry, and I shouldn't have said that. You were brave for coming to me, and as soon as I said I would do anything to save them, their deaths were as much of a fault as mine. But we, you and I, really know who killed them: Voldemort."_

" _What does it matter. She died anyways. I loved her, and now she is gone."_

" _Severus, my dear boy. Everybody makes mistakes in life, some worse than others. Voldemort, Tom, He was a student here. I knew he was turning to the dark arts, and I did nothing. I thought it was a mere, healthy, fascination that all powerful wizards had. But I was wrong. I could have stopped him. It was one of the worst mistakes I have ever made. Just think of the suffering I have caused by my inaction. That is why we fight. To correct our mistakes, to restore the good in the world. I have been in your position before, standing where you stand, but don't make this mistake, Severus. If you make this mistake, you cannot hope to fix the others you have made."_

 _Severus stepped away from the window and towards the aged man. He fell to his knees and hugged the man around the middle, crying, for the first time in his adult life, into the various layers of the man's purple robes._

" _There there, my boy," he whispered, running his fingers soothingly through his hair._

 _Severus thought how he longed for his own father to comfort him this way. To show any sympathy for him at all. The now branded death eater took comfort in the fact that someone as good as Dumbledore did not think he was beyond saving, beyond being good._

 _The wise man seemed to read Severus's mind, "You are a good man at heart, Severus, and we will not let Lily Potter die in vain. Now come, there is much to plan for."_

Severus started moving as soon as they broke eye contact. Potter didn't realize what was happening before it was too late. Hermione leaned out of the window. Potter made a grasp for her hand, but her delicate fingers slipped out of his hand as she started her rapid descent. Severus pushed the idiot boy out of the way an dove out of the window after the girl. He willed himself to fall faster and was silently grateful the Dark Lord imparted with him the skills to fly.

He grabbed on to the girl with his arms and legs. With a 'pop' they disappeared.

SSHGSSHG

They landed with a hard 'thud' on Severus's couch, breaking it into several pieces. Severus had tried to slow their speed before they apparated, as acceleration was not lost during the process. He had been on the bottom and therefore had taken most of the force. He got up slowly and cast a diagnostic charm on the imbecilic woman. Nothing was wrong with her except her accelerated heartrate. He then sent a Patronus to the Potter boy, as he would probably come looking for them if he hadn't.

After he checked himself over and making sure everything was okay, he turned on Hermione.

"What in Merlin's Beard were you thinking?" He yelled, "Was that really your plan? Do you think you're allowed to just die like that? Do you know what would have happened if Potter and I had not showed ourselves exactly at that moment, or if it was just Potter and he obviously didn't know what you were going to do?"

He took a deep breath, "You would have died, Miss Granger," He bit out angrily, "You would have died in front of the students no less, in front of Potter. Do you have any IDEA what that does to a person?"

Severus finally looked down at the trembling woman and thanked merlin that she wasn't crying.

"I used to think that you were brilliant, Miss Granger, but now I know you are just as stupid and idiotic as the rest of them."

Hermione stood up and pushed Severus back into the wall with surprising force.

"You have no idea what I have been going through!" she shouted at him.

"I lost a child too!" He yelled.

Then she kissed him. He froze, not knowing what to do. She deepened the kiss, and whatever anger he was feeling moments earlier melted away temporarily as his animalistic need, heightened by adrenaline, took over.

He started pushing her back, leading her towards the bedroom while trying to feel every inch of the girl through her nightdress. He pushed her onto his bed and hiked up her dress. He unbuttoned his pants, releasing his erection, and after prepping her briefly, thrust inside of her. It felt heavenly as he set a rough pace. She was moaning underneath him and running her hands through his hair but then something happened.

He was back in the dark lord's presence. He was making Severus watch his memory of killing Lily Potter. He watched the man send the killing curse towards James and move towards the nursery. Lily was there, his beautiful Lily, shielding her boy who was in his crib, begging the dark lord to spare them. But the evil wizard, without pause, without remorse, cast the killing curse at her. She screamed before it hit her in the chest, crumpling to the floor.

"Lily!" He shouted as he came.

He collapsed, spent, on his bed.

SSHGSSHGSSHG

Hermione thought that nothing had felt so right. She knew as soon as she left the window that she did not want to die. She wanted to keep living, she wanted to get her magic back, to get her masteries, to fall in love, to have children. But it was too late. Then Severus had grabbed her, had saved her life. She knew in that moment that she wanted to be with him.

She never knew that Sex could feel this amazing. The roughness, the passion, it just wasn't there with Harry. She had never felt this amount of emotion with anyone else. Then her heart shattered. He said her name as he spilled his seed inside of her. Lily.

Hermione immediately started sobbing. What had felt so amazing suddenly felt disgusting, dirty, degrading. She pushed away quickly, replacing her underwear and adjusting her nightgown.

"Hermione?" The man asked confusedly as she fled from the room.

Hermione was grateful that it was a Hogsmeade weekend, the halls were deserted as she rushed to McGonagall's office. She arrived out of breath, tears streaming down her face, and said the password.

"Hermione, what's going on?" she asked, taking in her disheveled appearance.

"I need some time off. Suspend my pay, I don't know when, or if, I will be back."

"Hermione," The graying woman said in a warning tone.

"Please, Minerva," Hermione stressed her first name, "I need this, I can't be here."

McGonagall seemed to think for several moments.

"In light of everything that has happened, you are due some time off. Please come back after Christmas break, as you are in a binding contract with the school that must be fulfilled. If you wish to not renew your contract after the spring term, so be it."

Hermione nodded her thanks and grabbed some flu powder.

"Oh, and Hermione,"

Hermione turned around. She saw the woman she often regarded as a mother figure with a deep, intense worry all over her face.

"Please, if you need anything, all you need is to ask."

Hermione nodded before throwing powder in the fireplace and shouting:

"The Burrow!"

SHGSSHGSSHG

Minutes later, Severus burst through Minerva's office door. Minerva noted he looked frantic, his hair and clothes disarrayed and a wild look in his eye.

"What did you do?" She asked accusingly.

"Something very very bad."


	9. In Which there is a Suspect

**A/N: I wrote this instead of writing my paper. LOVE ME!**

 **In all seriousness thank you for reading and reviewing. I love you guys.**

In Which There is a Suspect

Hermione Granger was immediately greeted with the sight of a topless Lavender who yelped and fell off the couch when she saw Hermione emerge out of the fireplace. Ron, who was completely naked, stood up to pick Lavender up of the ground. When he saw what made his girlfriend yell, he quickly ducked behind the couch.

"Blimey Hermione!" He yelled, "Call ahead before you come through!"  
Hermione wanted to laugh at the sight of the flustered couple, but instead she broke down once again into sobs. The couple dressed quickly and Ron picked Hermione up off the floor and brought her into the kitchen as Lavender made tea.

"What happened?" He asked.

Just then Harry burst through the front door.

"Hermione Jean Granger!" He yelled, rushing up to her.

He grabbed her of the stool and hugged her tight. She couldn't breathe, but she found at the moment, she didn't care much. Harry pulled back and kissed her square on the mouth. She didn't kiss him back, it felt wrong, it didn't feel like it had before Snape, but it was still comforting.

He pulled away and looked at her. Hermione could see the blatant worry on his face and sighed.

"Do you have any idea what that would have done to me?" He asked, choking on his tears.

"I'm sorry, Harry."

"Promise me, promise me that you will never ever even think about doing something like that again."

She nodded her assent. Lavender and Ron were looking between the two, numerous questions obvious poised on their lips. Harry held her hand as she started to recount the happenings of the last few hours.

"I was just so upset. I have lost my parents, my magic, I am locked inside of Hogwarts unable to see anyone regularly. I am forced to have children with someone I barely know. I just didn't know how to make it work. Everything was so confusing already, and then I lost August and… I couldn't handle it anymore. I wanted everything to end, so I set my mind to jump off the astronomy tower."

Lavender gasped and Ron drew in a deep breath.

"Severus," Hermione paused, inwardly cringing, "Snape saved me, apparated me to his room. As soon as I started falling, I knew I didn't really want to die, but it was too late. Then, when we appeared in his rooms, I was so happy. We started making out and one thing led to another…"

She felt Harry squeeze her hand tightly. His face had gone white, but he displayed no notion of anger in his face. Hermione gulped and continued.

"But then, then he said her name. Lily."

She started crying again and Harry rubbed circles on her back, pulling her onto his lap on top of the rickety stool, holding her securely. There was a soft knock on the door and Ron started cursing under his breath as he went to open the door.

There stood the man that no one wanted to see at the moment. Severus Snape loomed on the doorstep, sneering at the red headed boy. He looked into the house and his face softened when he made eye contact with Hermione. He stepped into the house and walked towards the kitchen. He saw Hermione sitting on Harry's lap and stiffened.

"Can I speak to Hermione, alone?" He asked the group of people.

"Look, Professor, we really appreciate you saving _our_ ," Ron stressed, "Hermione's life, but—"

He was cut off by Lavender rushing around the kitchen island and coming nose to nose with the surly man.

"How," _smack_ "could," _smack_ "you," _smack_ "do," _smack_ "something," _smack_ "like," _smack_ "that!" Lavender yelled at him, hitting him in the chest and shoulders, "How dare you long for a woman long dead when you have a woman here who needs you!"

Ron pulled her off of Severus, trying to whisper calming things into her ears. Severus drew up to his full height and glared at Harry.

"I trusted you not to share that particular information with anyone!"

"I haven't told anyone besides Hermione, I swear," Harry answered, holding his hands up in the air to indicate his innocence, letting Hermione ungracefully slide off of his lap.

"Then how?"

Lavender looked at him with defiance in her eyes. Severus shook his head, turning back to Hermione.

"Please?"

"Snape, can you just—" Harry was interrupted by Hermione grabbing the professor by the arm and leading him outside.

They left the house and walked towards the tree she had always studied by when she came to the Weasley's during the summer. She shivered in the late fall air, but pushed the sharp, cold feeling away. She stopped under the tree and looked at the man expectantly. He seemed to be unable to find his words, so she sat there, silent, staring into his eyes. He eventually cleared his throat and started to speak.

The man ran his long fingers through his silky raven hair, a look of exasperation and frustration on his face. Hermione thought it looked like the emotions almost pained him. She wanted to hug him, tell him everything was going to be all right, but then she remembered his voice shouting another girl's name, a dead girl's name, and she restrained herself.

"I suspect Potter told you some of what my life was like in addition to what I have showed you?"

She was taken aback by his analytical tone and nodded.

"I have loved Lily Evans since I was five years old. For a long time, she was the only light in my life, the only good thing I could cling to. Then I said that word, that DAMN word, and she chose Potter over me. She chose the boy who bullied me throughout my days at school. She couldn't forgive me."

He took a deep breath, and this time Hermione did reach out and squeeze his hand, encouraging him to push on. He gave a half-hearted grimace that she supposed could be interpreted as a smile.

"That summer," he shuddered, "that summer my father beat my mother to death. She had lost her magic long before that, and there was nothing I could do. I was at work when it happened. I came back to my father drinking over the body of my mother. I started screaming at him, but he was still bigger than me. I think he would have beat me to death too if not for my will to live—to get revenge. When I got back to school, I tried to tell Lily what had happened, but she wouldn't listen to me. She wouldn't even look at me. So I started retreating into the Slytherin house. Narcissa Black put me in contact with Lucius. I stayed with him the summer after I graduated. That's when I took the mark."

"Severus, I am so sorry. No child should ever be put in that position."

Ignoring her, he continued on.

"My first mission was to kill my father. I did it. Without remorse and without thought. That was the day I became just like him. I have tortured and killed and raped, Hermione. I can't ever take that back. I can't do it over," he shook his head, "And then I told the Dark Lord the prophecy. As soon as I found out he was going after Lily, my Lily, I went to Dumbledore. I begged him for forgiveness, I begged him to save her, to save all of them. I pledged to spend my life in servitude to Dumbledore if he could just do something to save them. I didn't know until after the fact that Pettigrew was a Death Eater. The slimy little traitor. They died. I was broken, but I was free."

"Severus, it wasn't your fault."

"But it was my fault. I carried that guilt for a long time. I almost did what you did, standing where you stood. Dumbledore was there to save me, like I should have been to save you. He told me that I shouldn't make that mistake, that I couldn't correct any other of my mistakes if I took my own life."

"When the Dark Lord was reincarnated, he took me to a back room where he tortured me endlessly. He made me watch Lily die. Over and over again. It was my personal punishment for not looking for him, for not trying to bring him back. I continued, after that, as a lifeless husk for a long time. She was the first woman I have ever loved. The first person to ever show me kindness. I have no excuse other than my twisted mind and the horror of watching you fall from that tower."

"I understand, Severus," she paused and tried to catch his eye, but he was looking staunchly at the ground, "Severus, I forgive you. I do."

He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead, then held her close. They sat like that, absorbing each other's warmth under the tree on the crisp autumn day. Eventually, he pulled back and squared himself to her.

"With everything that has been going on, you need your magic back, and we need to go speak with Draco. Do you remember what I said about binding ceremonies, how they could bring back your magic? I want you to bind yourself to me."

"Severus, I don't know if that is a good idea."

"You need your magic, and in the future, we are going to be creating four souls. It's not like we could ever be apart from each other anyways, it's not practical. I know you love Potter, but I will not allow another man to raise my kids. You can continue having relations, but only if you—"

"Severus!" Hermione yelled, "That's not what I meant, and I don't love Harry. Not that way."

"Then what did you mean, you silly girl?" He gently stroked her hair, tucking a few strands behind her ear.

Hermione took a deep breath, "Could you love me?"

She immediately felt him stiffen. She already know what the answer was. He wouldn't look at her and he had physically stepped away from her.

"No."

Hermione sucked her breath in and nodded. She didn't know why, but tears started to spring unwillingly from her eyes. She tried to force them down.

"Would you love our children?"

"Of course I would love our children Hermione. They would be a part of me, and I would not be my father. But I couldn't bring myself to love someone again. I don't think I can replace Lily in my heart. I just couldn't—"

"No, Severus, you don't need to explain. We weren't—aren't—supposed to be together. I'll agree to bind myself with you, but I want you to think if you couldn't love anyone or if you just can't love me. I don't want you to be miserable on my behalf."

"I don't need to think—"

"Yes, yes you do, Severus," she said touching his chest.

"Hermione, don't be ridiculous, come back to Hogwarts. I'll think on it, I promise, but I want you to be safe."

"Ron still lives here and Lav comes on the weekends. They're some of he strongest people I know. And I am in a magical building so the ministry won't be able to detect the change in my magic."

Hermione looked up at the man she was thinking about being bound to for the rest of her life. He looked worried, so maybe he at least would come to care about her welfare. He was smart, we could challenge her. He had a temper, she knew, she had been on the receiving end of more than one of his outbursts, but so did she, maybe even one that could rival his. Could she deal with that? Would he be a good father? Would she a good mother? She shook her head of the last two questions. In spite of any misgivings, they would be parents sooner rather than later.

Hermione turned and started walking back to the burrow.

SSHGSSHG

Severus watched Hermione return to the burrow. Her friends came out to greet her and for just the four of them, they were extremely loud. Hermione turned around and made eye contact with him. He couldn't decipher the emotions she was trying to convey, and so he did what he had always done. He turned away and apparated back to Hogsmeade and made the long trek back up to the castle in contemplative silence.

SSHGSSHG

Harry saw it. As he engulfed Hermione in a hug, she had turned around to look at the dark, unpleasant man that had tortured him throughout his childhood. He saw something in her eyes as she looked at the other man that she had never had for him. He knew that the woman of his dreams was falling in love with another man.

She looked back at him and smiled. It was warm and inviting. He wished that he didn't know her better than he knew himself, but as he searched her eyes, he didn't see the spark that was there for Snape. They all went back inside together and after visiting for a couple of minutes, the girls went upstairs to have a lie down. He grabbed his coat, ready to leave, but Ron caught him by the elbow.

"I love you, mate," the redhead started awkwardly.

Harry started laughing, hard.

"It sounds like you're breaking it off with me."

Harry stopped laughing when his best mate didn't say anything. He looked at Ron, who was staring at the floor.

"You can't come back here."

Harry was taken aback by his words, "What do you mean, mate?"

"It's for Hermione. She can't let herself fall in love with you around. It's unhealthy for the both of you."

"Snape could never love her like I do," Harry whispered.

"She could never love you like you love her. It's killing you, seeing her with another person, don't think I can't tell. You both need time apart."

"I don't need—"

"She almost killed herself Harry! This isn't about you."

There was fire in Ron's eyes. Harry quickly checked himself. He realized that he was being selfish, that maybe Hermione needed time away.

"When can I see her again?" He asked.

"Christmas. It's only two months, you'll live."

Harry nodded and headed towards the door, sticking his hand inside the pocket of his jacket. He pulled out a business card with a name on it he didn't recognize. A vision of a dark-haired girl in sunglasses flashed before his eyes.

 _Maybe it is time for a change._

He turned around, "When did you get so sensible?"

Ron laughed, "Everybody asks me that now. I am about to have a kid, I guess that changes things."

"I'm proud of you," Harry said before walking out of the house into the crisp mid-afternoon air.

He took a deep breath before shutting his eyes, visualizing his empty temporary flat. He felt the familiar squeeze of apparition and dematerialized.

SSHGSSHG

Severus was chilled to the bone when he arrived at the Headmistresses' office. He knew he needed to talk to someone, and she had been the only co-worker he had ever found tolerable, but he had never placed this much trust in someone other than Dumbledore.

 _And Hermione,_ he thought, remembering the pensive and his confession of love for another woman.

He shook his head of the thought and uttered the password. The statue moved aside, and he begun the ascent up the tower. He knocked on the inner door and heard a faint 'enter'.

"Now Severus, if you spend any more time in here, I must insist that you start scheduling appointments."

Severus's mouth twisted into a wry smile. Maybe it was time for a change.

"Your dry wit is really what this castle needed, Minerva," he answered.

The older, graying woman looked up from her paperwork, "Who are you and what have you done with Severus?"

He scowled, "I thought maybe I should be more civil among the staff, but if it displeases you, I will return to the dungeons."

He turned around to leave, but Minerva called out to him.

"Oh, Severus, humor an old woman."

"You're not that old," He said awkwardly.

"Please, I started teaching here, what? Your second year? I am old Severus. I am thinking about retiring soon. I am going to need a replacement," She gave him a knowing look.

"No, no. The board…"

"The board has no say in who I appoint, but it is your duty to not mess up."

"The last time I was Headmaster, it did not go well."

"The last time you were Headmaster you kept the students safe the best you could. I have it under my authority that you spent countless hours, going days without sleeping to patrol the hallways at night so they were not caught by other undesirable persons."

"Minerva," he said, forcefully, warningly.

"I'm not leaving any time soon, I just wanted to put the idea in your head. Now, how was Hermione?"

Severus paused, unsure of how to answer.

"She is still staying with Weasley," he decided.

"But how is she? And what did you do that made her leave in such a hurry? I had no idea you were that bad at it." The old woman looked at her knowingly.

"Does being head of this school make you omniscient? I received no such powers, but you and Dumbledore both seem to know every going on in the entire building."

"Severus, your powers of observation are astute, but what you don't understand is human nature. There are only two things that would make a woman cry like that. If she was lied to, or if something particularly undesirable happened during…that," the woman finished, scrunching up her nose.

"Well, it was something of that nature, but she has seemed to forgive me."

"That's excellent, I have always found she is an extremely forgiving person, especially with her boys, though I imagine you are one of her boys now."

Severus nodded, lost in thought. Hermione was an extremely forgiving person. Did he deserve such forgiveness?

"Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?"  
Minerva's all-knowing eyes irked Severus, and he blurt out what he was thinking without a thought.

"I told her I couldn't love her."

Minerva, instead of berating him, nodded her head, "How did she take it?"

"Fairly well. She agreed to bind herself to me. We are going to be having children together, and she really does need her magic back."

Minerva looked as if though she was contemplating something. She nodded, dismissing him.

"Wait, Severus."

He turned back around.

"You should woo her."

"Why would I do such a thing, I don't want, nor do I need her love."

"You shouldn't tell such lies Severus. You've been wanting for love and acceptance since your mother died. That's the reason you joined the Death Eaters, to feel some sense of purpose, to have a place in our world. When you came back, Dumbledore told me what had happened. I wanted to help, but it is frowned upon for teachers to have relationships, even platonic, even motherly relationships. I saw you were hurting, but I couldn't let myself help you."

"You couldn't have done anything, Minerva, don't blame yourself for how I turned out."

"I was the one who sent you those new robes your seventh year," she admitted, "You came to school in your robes from the year before. They were tattered and you had grown. Dumbledore forbid me to do such things, but I think he knew by forbidding me it would only make me want to do it more."

"And for Christmas, my Birthday?" He asked, curious.

"Also me, but I should have done more."

They both sat there in awkward silence. Minerva cleared her throat.

"In any case, you do want to be loved. You may not be able to or let yourself love sweet Hermione, but she has plenty of people to love her. Give her someone to love Severus. Try it out, see how you feel."

SSHGSSHG

 _A few hours earlier_

It was Molly's first Hogsmeade weekend. She was nearly shaking with excitement. Her mother had not allowed her to go in her third year, something for which he had resented her for far longer than she would care to admit.

She walked outside arm in arm with her friends. There was a whole hoard of students waiting for the supervising teacher to lead them down to the little village.

Just then, Molly felt the strongest feeling she had ever felt. It hit her full force and she almost staggered. She raised her head and looked around, wondering who it was. They started their walk down to the town, and the feeling, or rather someone else's feeling, stayed with her.

About half way to the village, she identified the emotion. It was guilt, she determined, but different than I cheated on a test guilt, or I was out past curfew guilt. It was different, and so much deeper than anything she had ever felt before. Eventually the feeling started to dissipate. She looked around and saw the only person to have left the group.

It was Savanah Emerald, a sixth year Gryffindor. She was going down an alleyway. Molly made some excuse to her friend and split off from the group following the other girl. She watched the older girl walk into a place called Hogs Head.

 _What is she so guilty about?_

 _ **A/N: I feel like Severus needs a friend, enter Minerva.**_

 **Edited 07/20/2019**

 **Please Review**


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